Fences
This weekend, our family worked together to fence in our garden. We used 34 fence posts, 150 feet of fencing, and some fishing line. We’ve had a garden for many years, but the last several years have been a bit frustrating as we’ve had to defend against groundhogs and deer. We’ve tried a few other remedies like deer repellant, have-a-heart traps, and hair clippings. But we’ve still dealt with produce that has been mowed down in the middle of the night by the animals that live in our area. So far, the fence seems to be working.
We live in a time when people tout the benefits of living beyond our dreams and our boundaries. I’ve even written a few blog posts about the benefits of stretching outside our comfort zone. But there’s another side of the equation that needs to be looked at from time to time. Fences are important tools in our lives. We need fences in our lives to keep out the “critters” that can damage our lives. We need fences in our lives to keep us from journeying into unsafe territory. And sometimes we need fences in our lives to remind us what things are our business and what things are not our business. With this in mind, here are a few ideas for establishing appropriate fences in our lives.
3 Ways To Set Appropriate Fences In Our Lives:
1.) Set personal boundaries. We need to be smart enough and bold enough to set up our own fences. For example, Leanne and I have a “rule” that we will avoid meeting alone with members of the opposite gender. Rules or boundaries like this keep us from journeying into unsafe territory.
2.) Find accountability. Is there someone in your life (other than your spouse) who knows the true condition of your heart. Someone like this will ask the tough questions and will also give us early warning signs when our fences need repair.
3.) Spend time in God’s Word and in Christian community. These actions keep us growing and alert to God’s business. When we know God’s Word and experience this type of community, our fence is used more effectively. Our fenced in area becomes a refuge and a safe house where we can be restored and re-energized for service to those outside the fence.
What are the pluses and minuses of having a fence? Do you have a fence around your yard? How do you keep the “critters” out?
Announcing The Winners Of The Free Advertising Experiment
Last week, I announced an experiment of sorts. I mentioned that I was going to give free advertising spots on The Stretched Blog main page to three worthy candidates who best answered a question about why the The Stretched Blog would be a good place to promote their blog. I’m happy to say that I received several worthy “entries”, and I’m excited today to announce the winners of this experiment.
The winners include Michael Shaw, Joe Lalonde, and Bill Grandi. I have finalized the ad spots with two of the winners which you can see on the main page (and you can preview below). And I should have the third ad finalized in the next few days. Stop back on the main page of the blog to see the ad for Bill’s blog. Please click on their links and check out their blogs. All three of these bloggers have become good friends over the past year, and they each have a different twist on their writing which I’m proud to share with The Stretched Community. Thanks again to everyone who supports the blog. I”m excited to see how this experiment finishes out!
Do you advertise on your blog? Do you advertise on other blogs? What has been the impact of advertising on your blogging experience? (For more information on advertising on The Stretched Blog, click here.)
Poison Ivy
I’ve always had a love-hate relationship with poison ivy. I’m quite certain that poison ivy loves me. And I’m absolutely sure that I hate poison ivy. I know what it looks like, and I do my best to stay away from it, but for some reason it always finds me.
Like when I was working for an elderly couple from my church. I used to take care of the eleven acre property of this couple who were in their mid to late eighties. I cut their grass. I raked their leaves. I split their wood. And I even tore out the roots in their backyard with my bare hands. Little did I know that these were poison ivy roots. A few days after pulling up the roots, I looked like Donald Duck with my fingers webbed together thanks to the swelling induced by a bad case of poison ivy. This was nothing two weeks and some strong steroids couldn’t fix.
You would have thought that I had learned my lesson. Obviously not!
A couple of summers later, I was land surveying with another gentleman from my church. It was often my job to clear out the property lines, so we could get a good measurement through a straight line of sight. In New Jersey, property lines mean poison ivy habitat. Sure enough, I was back on the steroids after a bout with poison ivy on one of my land surveying jobs.
After that, I was more careful for the most part. I would pick up a spot of poison ivy here and there, but it was never as bad as before. That all changed a couple of weeks before Isaac was born when I picked up a bad case of poison ivy while I was cleaning up brush in the back of our old house. I had poison ivy blisters up and down both of my arms. Meanwhile, my wife was ready to deliver our son any day. I remember worrying that I wouldn’t be able to hold our newborn child if these blisters didn’t heal. Thankfully, Isaac’s arrival timed up perfectly with the clearing of my poison ivy.
I haven’t had poison ivy that bad since Isaac was born, but I still get it from time to time. In fact, a small case of poison ivy inspired this post. I’m currently enduring poison ivy under my eye and on my arm. Time for the calamine lotion!
Poison ivy is a weird thing. I have to wonder why God created poison ivy. I even speculate that poison ivy wouldn’t exist if Adam and Eve had stayed away from the forbidden fruit. Poison ivy is hard to remove. The roots and vines of a poison ivy plant spread out making it a challenge to completely isolate. Just like poison ivy, our words can cause plenty of pain and suffering. In the Bible, James even refers to our tongues as poison:
All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and sea creatures are being tamed and have been tamed by mankind, but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God’s likeness. James 3:7-9
So as I’m left here to itch, I’m also left with a reminder about my tongue. May I use my words to glorify God and uplift others today. I don’t want to be poisonous. (Pass the anti-itch cream!)
Do you have a poison ivy story? How’s your tongue?
Happy Father’s Day
This morning, I woke up to breakfast in bed. What a great way to start the day!
Happy Father’s Day to all the dads out there!
School’s Out For The Summer – Another Milestone
This morning, I’ll be going out to breakfast with my wife and kids and then I’ll be heading into the middle school for an awards assembly and celebration gathering for my daughter who will be ending her middle school career.
As I was tucking her into bed last night, Hannah confessed that she was sad that this was her last day at the school before she heads into high school in the fall. She has grown close to a great group of friends. She has enjoyed the joys and challenges brought on by her wonderful teachers. And she has especially fallen in love with the library and the library staff.
I know she’ll do fine at the next level, but I can also empathize with her feelings of sadness at the thought of leaving familiar territory and the prospect of facing the unknown. While it’s important to celebrate the past (and that’s what we’ll be doing today), it is also important to embrace the future. Just as God’s love has been evident in the past, His mercies will be new in the journey ahead.
The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;his mercies never come to an end;
they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. Lamentations 3:22-23
So as one of our kids bids farewell to middle school today, I thank God for the promise of a new day, a new chapter, and a continued hope that lies ahead.
Hannah, I’m so proud of you, and I’m looking forward to seeing how God reveals his mercies to you in the next step of your adventure.
What milestone are you facing these days? Are you looking forward with apprehension and fear or with hope and excitement (or maybe some of both)?
The Stretched Blog Visits Living Better Stories
Today is an exciting day here on The Stretched Blog. I have the privilege of guest posting over at Jeremy Statton’s blog (Living Better Stories) today. My post titled Rediscovering My Dreams shares some of my journey and thoughts regarding overseas missions. Here’s an excerpt to get you started:
It was almost two years ago that my wife and I were making final preparations for the missions trip of a lifetime to Nairobi, Kenya.
A Painful Death
As we finalized our packing list and visited the doctors for our final immunizations, the wheels began to fall off our plans. My wife was starting to deal with significant anxiety issues and her health began to deteriorate. We wrestled with a decision we dreaded.
Should we go on this trip and risk health problems in an unfamiliar country? Or should we cancel the trip and miss out on this adventure?
[To read the rest, click here.]
Please head over to read the rest of the post. Also, check out the rest of Jeremy’s blog, and sign-up to become one of his regular readers.
As I mentioned earlier, Kevin Haggerty is guest posting here today. Check out his post titled Learning To Count To Five by clicking here.
Announcing June Giveaway Winners
Last week, I announced that I would be giving away two prizes to lucky winners. The winners were selected randomly, but their chances increased based on interaction on the blog and other social media platforms. This was the first time, I’ve tried something quite like this, and I’m happy to say that the results were promising. I added several new subscribers to the blog and new fans of the Jon Stolpe Stretched Facebook Fan Page. There were also new commenters on the blog this week, and The Stretched Blog received several plugs this week via Twitter. Overall, the blog experienced the third highest week of traffic since the beginning of the year. I will definitely be trying this type of giveaway again.
Okay, I’ve delayed long enough. Here are the winners of this month’s giveaway:
Winner of Platform by Michael Hyatt: Mark Sullens
(Mark entered by being a fan of the Jon Stolpe Stretched Facebook Fan Page.)
Winner of Love Does by Bob Goff: Tim McNatt
(Tim entered by being a subscriber of The Stretched Blog.)
I’ll be reaching out to the winners this week via e-mail to confirm mailing addresses. Thanks to everyone for entering this month’s giveaway!
What would you like to see me giveaway next month? What other giveaways should The Stretched Community check out?
May 2012 Top Posts and Commenters
May was another record-breaking month for the Stretched blog. Overall traffic increased 11.26% from last month’s previous record high. In addition, the Jon Stolpe Stretched Facebook fan page has added several new followers over the past month. The community and platform are growing, and I’m excited to see how God may use the Stretched Community to impact the world.
As always, I like to share the top posts for the past month. Most of this month’s most popular posts were posted in May; however, one post from March continues to be at the top of the charts for this month. Here are the top posts from May 2012:
1. The Power To Change A Family Tree (5/2/2012)
2. Leap Of Faith (3/21/2012)
3. Book Review: By Faith, Not By Sight by Scott MacIntyre (5/29/2012)
4. Writing – A Strange Discipline (5/24/2012)
5. My Mom (5/8/2012)
6. Ice Breaker – Star Wars (5/3/2012)
7. Perkiomen Valley Blogger’s Society (5/20/2012)
8. Ice Breaker – Questions For A Stretched Blogger (5/17/2012)
9. 10 Things To Avoid On Camping Trips (5/27/2012)
10. Foundations Class Starts Today (5/6/2012)
And here are the top commenters for May 2012:
1. Larry Carter (28)
2. Tom Tarver (19)
3. Joe Lalonde (15)
4. Michael Shaw (14)
Thanks again to everyone who stopped by and to everyone who left a comment. Your readership, comments, and friendship mean the world to me. In the coming month, I will be looking for more ways to extend the Stretched Community and to broaden my platform. I am looking to launch a contest for this month. I am also looking for new opportunities to guest post around the blog world. Finally, I will be starting to build a guest post backlog and interview backlog to post while I’m in Guatemala later this summer. If you’re interested in guest posting here or participating in a Stretched interview, drop me a note in the comments so we can connect.
Thanks again for a great month. Don’t forget to share The Stretched Blog with your family and friends.
If you’re a blogger, what was the top post on your blog this month? If you’re not a blogger, what was your favorite post here this month?
Summer Small Group Suggestions
Last night, our small group (H.O.P.E.) celebrated the start of the summer season with an end of school year picnic/barbecue. It was a great way to celebrate a wonderful year together serving others and growing closer to each other. I have thorough enjoyed watching our kids connect with the kids from the other families in our group, and I have enjoyed bonding with the other adults. I’ve also enjoyed serving together with these wonderful families. Over the paste year, we have made crafts and spent time with the seniors at the Colonnade of Schwenksville nursing home, made a holiday meal for international students at Montgomery County Community College, cleaned up the backyard at the Norristown Community House, packaged books at Cradles to Crayons, served breakfast at the Ronald McDonald House, made packages for cancer patient siblings at the Phoenixville Hospital, stuffed eggs for a local Easter egg hunt, and made cards for soldiers. We have had a great year together!
As we approach summer, we’ve decided to take a couple of months off while we all enjoy our summer vacations and summer schedule.
The summer often presents a crossroads for many small groups. Should they keep meeting regularly throughout the summer or should they scale back until the fall? This is a great question. Here are my ideas for how to approach this season.
1. Consider meeting regularly. If your group has enough mass, you might be able to get away with continuing right through the summer. If you decide to do this, I would recommend selecting a study topic that allows for group members to come and go. Many group members will likely miss a few meetings, and it’s a good idea to use a study topic that people can jump into at any time.
2. Consider meeting once a month. This is a great opportunity to keep the group going with a few social events. Picnics, swim parties, and outdoor meet-ups are great ways to stay connected during the summer months.
3. Consider taking a break. From the introduction above, you can see the this is what our group, has decided to do. We are all pretty busy over the summer, and this break will provide some time to focus on our families. Having said this, I’m already looking forward to meeting again in the fall.
4. Consider using the summer as a natural end to your group. Sometimes, it can be awkward to stop a group and start over. The summer can provide a natural time to transition from one group to another. This can also be a great time to release a leader who needs a break from small group leadership.
If you’re not in a small group, this may not make sense. I’m praying that you find a small group to call home – to connect – and to find the right balance of grace and truth. If you’re already in a group, I hope this is helpful as your group approaches the summer.
Are you in a small group? How does your group approach the summer? What other suggestions do you have for summer small groups?
Foundations Class – Week 3 – Groups
This past Sunday, I led our third Foundations Class based on Fully Devoted by John Ortberg. Our first class was on Grace. Our second class was about Growth. And our third class focused on Groups. As you may imagine, I was pretty excited about this week. I’m a huge grouplife fan, and I have a passion for seeing people connected in community through groups.
The lesson for this week reminded me that being in a group is more than just about connection. Being in a group is about experiencing the life transforming power of truth and grace. You see, we all need truth and grace in our lives. If we have too much grace and not enough truth, we will miss out on growth. We will fail to face up to things in our lives that need change and transformation. On the other hand, if we have too much truth in our lives and not enough grace, we will get bogged down in the sin that entangles all of us. We need both truth and grace in equal amounts.
When it comes to dispensing truth and grace to those around us, we also need to be balanced. We need to speak both truth and grace into those around us. When we fail to do this, we miss out on showing love. My friend, Diane, showed me a great chart that helps to demonstrate this principle. I’ll do my best to explain it.
Looking at the chart above, Grace is plotted along the x or horizontal axis and Truth is plotted along the y or vertical axis (I love this kind of talk!). If we fail to show grace and we fail to show truth, it shows are lack of involvement in the lives of others (this is the RED area of the chart). When we show truth and we fail to show grace, we are graceless (the YELLOW area of the chart). On the other side of the spectrum, when we show grace and we fail to show truth, we are lying (the GREEN area of the chart). Where we hit our sweet spot, we show both truth and grace (the BLUE area of the chart). This is how we truly exhibit love towards one another.
Christian community isn’t always perfect. Over the years, I’ve seen the good, the bad, and the ugly that can sometimes happen even amongst groups that call themselves Christian. We need to strive for the best. We need to be marked as people who love. Love happens when truth and grace coexist. And I believe that small groups are a perfect place to flesh this out.
Do you have a relationship where grace and truth exist? Are you in a small group? Why or why not?