The Discipline of Celebration

Yesterday marked the one year anniversary of the release of my book, On Track: Life Lessons from the Track & Field.

I’ve learned a lot through the process of writing and self-publishing my first book.  The book hasn’t become a best seller yet, but it has brought me rich experiences.  This is a reason to celebrate.

When was the last time you stopped to celebrate?

In the pursuit of stretch, we sometimes forget to stop and celebrate the good things in our life.

In honor of this week’s milestone, I’d like to invite you to celebrate with me.  For the next week starting TODAY, I have reduced the price on the Kindle version of On Track: Life Lessons from the Track & Field to 99 cents.

Please pass the world along, so others can join in the celebration.

Click HERE to go to Amazon to get the eBook.

How would your world be different if you made the decision to celebrate more often?  How has celebration made a difference in your life?

The Discipline of Being Present

“We’ve fallen into a trap of ever-widening orbits of contact, and there is a total disregard for the present moment.”

Jerry Seinfeld

Yesterday, I wrote about the discipline of showing up.  Now that you understand the importance of showing up, it’s time to make the most of your time here. The discipline of being present is crucial to your overall success in your life.

What does it mean to be present?

Being present means being in tune with what is going on around you. It means really listening to what others have to say. And it means contributing to the conversation.

Being present means engaging with others. It means actively participating in life. It means listening to the others and providing constructive feedback to help others grow. It also means listening to the feedback of others to help you grow.

When you show up, be on time. Introduce yourself to others. Talk to others.  Learn to put aside your other distractions and focus on those in front of you in the moment.

Being present will stretch you to become a better leader and a better human being.

How would your world be different if you made the decision to be present?  How has being present made a difference in your life?

The Discipline of Showing Up

Have you seen this excitement and enthusiasm wear off?

Do you sometimes feel like quitting or simply staying at home?

I don’t think you’re alone.

I have singed up for a hundred different activities, events, and commitments.  My initial excitement carries me for a while.  I want to see great things happen, but I get bored, frustrated, or tired.  The initial feelings of euphoria turn into dread as I fight the inner battle inside my head – should i stay at home or should I show up?

This is my story.

I signed up to help with youth group at our church after our youth pastor invited me to go on a missions trip to Guatemala with our church’s teenagers.  I remember the excitement as I attended my first few meetings after the trip.  It was fun to interact with the kids.  I was fueled by the momentum from our life changing trip together.  This feeling lasted for a little while but then it started to fade.  I was one of the older leaders at the weekly meetings.  I felt awkward at times in my interactions with the teenagers.  And there times when I would have preferred to be at home with my wife.

Generally, I kept going.  I decided to show up even when I didn’t feel like it.

Some nights were better than others.  There were many nights that turned into something very positive for me and hopefully for the teenagers I was hanging around each week.  This would not have happened if I decided not to show up.

I signed up for Toastmasters almost a year ago.  Again, I was initially excited about this opportunity, but this hasn’t always been the case as my time with the club has continued.  There our times when my mind is focused on things in my office, and I struggle to shift my brain into a Toastmasters mindset for our lunchtime meetings.

And yet, I have decided to show up.  This has led to many new friendships, tremendous personal growth, and improved self-confidence.  This week, I’ll be giving my tenth speech at our club’s bi-weekly meeting.  This means I will officially become a Competent Communicator – the first in a series of Toastmasters significant milestones.  This would not happen if I decided to stay across the street at my office.  I’m only three projects away from completing my Competent Leader, and this won’t happen if I don’t show up.

At home, there I are times when I come home exhausted after a hard day of work.  I want to be the best husband and father I can be.  I want to be intentional in my interactions with my wife and my kids.  This starts by simply showing up.

Showing up takes discipline.

Showing up will STRETCH you.

Showing up matters.

Showing up can change the world.

How would your world be different if you made the decision to simply show up?  How has showing up made a difference in your life?

From Fearless To Fearful To Freedom

For example, I used to love climbing trees.  If I could reach the lowest branch, you would find me climbing as high as I could go.  My parents had a giant willow tree in the backyard, and I remember climbing high into the tree as high as I could go.  Things changed on one of the first days of first grade when I fell out of an apple tree at a church picnic.  The fall was not very far, but I managed to land on my wrist.  From this point on, I became more cautious when it came to climbing trees.

I don’t remember fearing failure when I was young.  If I didn’t build the block tower correctly, I could always build it again.  As I went to school, I began to fear getting bad grades.  I feared letting my parents down.  My perfectionism was more driven by a fear of failure than a desire to succeed.

I went from fearless to afraid.

You would think that growing up would take me beyond my fears.  In reality, my fears have only matured.  I am now afraid of other things that are now on my radar as an adult.  I fear for the health of my wife and kids.  I fear for the future and my ability to provide for my family and to retire with enough funds to make it to the end of my life.  I still fear failure at my job, in my parenting, in my faith, and even in my writing.

Fear can paralyze us.

I was absolutely terrified about the prospect of going to Guatemala with my daughter leaving my wife and son behind.  When my friend, Adam Flora, asked me to go to Guatemala with him as a chaperone for our church’s youth group, I was initially convinced I was staying home in the comforts of the familiar.  I was afraid, and I was prepared to miss the adventure of a lifetime if it meant I didn’t have to face my fears.

It took a major leap of faith for me to say yes to Adam.  And the rest is history (if you’ve been reading along).  I traveled to Guatemala, and I fell in love with the people in the small village of Santo Domingo Xenacoj.  This first trip led to two more trips the past two summers with my family.  And it has led to a vision for returning to Xenacoj over and over again for the rest of my life.  Besides this, my initial trip to Guatemala helped me learn to face my fears with more confidence.

I still have fears in my life, but I have learned to move forward in faith and wisdom as I face the various things in my life that scare me to death.  I wouldn’t say I’m fearless, but I can say that my fear has become healthier.

This new perspective has given me freedom to face life with a renewed sense of fearlessness.

Fear not, for I am with you; Be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, Yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.  Isaiah 41:10

There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.  I John 4:18

How has fear impacted your life?  What do you fear?  How have you learned to face your fears?

5 Ways To Ignite A Fresh Start In Your Life Starting TODAY

Spring is a time for fresh starts.  Just like the Phillies (and all the other teams that didn’t make the playoffs last year), we can all use a fresh start.

When life gets overwhelming or just plain boring, a fresh start can reignite our passion for moving forward – for living life to the fullest.

Here are some ways to ignite a fresh start in your life starting today:

5 Ways To Ignite A Fresh Start In Your Life Starting TODAY

1. Start something new today.  Sometimes the best way to ignite a fresh start is by trying something new and different.  Try a new restaurant.  Wear a new outfit.  Meet someone new today.
2. Change your routine.  It’s easy to get stuck in a rut.  Eat something different for breakfast.  Drive a different way to work.  Do something to alter the pattern you’ve been in lately.  This change will give you a new perspective and a better opportunity for a fresh start.
3. Resist the urge to catch up.  A fresh start doesn’t mean trying to catch up all at one time.  Take it one day at a time.  If you try to catch up in one day, you will become discouraged.
4. Quit something.  Bob Goff quits something every Thursday.  The discipline of quitting things in your life that should be lower on your priority list is a great way to make room for more important things, and it’s a great way to ignite a fresh start in your life.
5. Find a reason to give thanks.  Gratitude is one of the best ways I know to ignite a fresh start.  Take time to observe the things going on around you today.  There has to be something worth appreciating.  When we are thankful, we are more likely to smile, and we are more likely to see the world through a new set of eyes.

What can you start today?  What do you need to change today?  What do you need to quit today?  What do you appreciate today?  Why do you need a fresh start?

Embarrassed For All The Wrong Reasons

Do you fear embarrassment?

When I was a little older, I wore Toughskins to school.  For those who don’t know, Toughskins were a denim-like pants produced by Sears.  They came in all sorts of colors:  blue, green, red, and brown.  At first it wasn’t a big deal.  After all, many other kids were wearing Toughskins.  But then something changed.  All the cool kids switched to Wrangler blue jeans.  Suddenly, the Toughskins weren’t so cool.  I’m pretty sure I felt embarrassment wearing my Toughskins those last few times.

When I was in college, my parents came to visit with my youngest brother one weekend.  For church, we went to East Main Presbyterian Church where many of my college classmates attended in their Sunday best.  I wanted to make the best impression on my classmates, so I was embarrassed when my little brother decided to crawl under the pews in the middle of the service.  I remember giving my Dad “the eye” as I asked him to take care of the situation.  While my Dad was escorting my brother out of the sanctuary, my brother pitched a fit proclaiming “You’re hurting me!” to the quiet congregation.  My cheeks turned red as I slumped down into my pew.

Looking back, I have allowed many of my perspectives on life to be blurred by those around me.  I want to fit in.  I want to stand out for the right reasons.  And I certainly don’t want to stick out for the wrong reasons.  The problem is I often get these reasons mixed up.

My guess is that I’m not alone.  We all get our priorities and perspectives wrong from time to time.  We get embarrassed by the things that should make us proud.

I’m thankful for my parents’ consistency at church even when they had to carry me into church half-naked.  I’m thankful for God’s provision through my parents (those Toughskins were actually very tough).  And I’m thankful for my brother who I care about far more than those sitting around me in church that Sunday.

There have been times when I have been embarrassed to call myself a Christian.  Sometimes this embarrassment comes from the “stupid” actions of others who call themselves Christians.  And some times this embarrassment comes from a fear of not fitting in with the world around me.  I want to wear my faith on my sleeve for everyone to see.  I want to represent the gospel well to those around me.  I don’t want to me ashamed to call myself a Christian.

For I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God that brings salvation to everyone who believes: first to the Jew, then to the Gentile. 

Romans 1:16

I shouldn’t be embarrassed to be a follower of Christ.  But I should be embarrassed by my lack of follow through on what the gospel says.  I should be embarrassed by the improper use of the gospel to defend positions and actions that don’t represent the love of Christ.

I don’t want to be embarrassed for the wrong reasons.  How about you?

Have you ever been embarrassed?  Tell us about it in the comments.

Tired Of Running Away? Come Home!

Running away will never make you free.

I really don’t remember what sparked this feeling one summer day, but I remember somehow feeling like I was being treated unfairly by my parents.  (This seems pretty crazy to me now that I’m a parent to two teenagers, and I have incredible respect for my parents today.)  Instead of working it out with my parents, I decided to run away.

I didn’t pack up my belongings or say good-bye.  I didn’t leave a letter explaining my departure.  I simply walked (or ran) out of the yard and down the street.  I walked out of the neighborhood and turned towards the busy road at the edge of town.  I kept walking and walking and walking.  Eventually, I found myself walking the long way back home.

I wish I could remember all the crazy thoughts that went through my head during my two or three hours as a runaway.  I wish I could remember my homecoming.  I can only assume my parents knew I would come back home.

We run away from home for many reasons and through a variety of methods.  We run away from a painful past.  We run away from conflict.  We run away from fear.  We run away by filling our schedules with all kinds of activities in hopes to keep us distracted from the reality we don’t want to face.  We run away through escapes of drugs, alcohol, television, food, and pornography.  And we run away severing ties with family and friends – the people we need the most.

Despite the tendency to run away, we are called back home.

Home is where we are welcomed back just as we are with open arms.

Is it time for you to come home?

What have you run from in your life?  What are you running away from now?

Forced To Slow Down And Stretch

I have a bulging disc in my lower back.  Most of the time it’s fine, but every once in a while it flares up.  For some reason, my back decided to flare up yesterday as I was getting up from my desk at work after sitting for a while.

Maybe I was sitting weird for too long, or maybe my back simply tightened up after my morning workout and cold shower.  Whatever the case, I will have to take a few days off from my more strenuous workouts to rest my back and to stretch it out.  Usually, I can get back into the swing of things in a few days.

I’ve been on a pretty good streak of working out this year.  Yesterday was the 84th day of the year, and I have managed to exercise 68 days so far.  This means I’ve worked out nearly 81% of the days this year.  If I keep this up, I’ll workout 295 days this year.

Sometimes our bodies are telling us to slow down.

The past week or so, I have been feeling particularly tired and worn out.  Perhaps, you’ve sensed this in my recent blog posts.

• Stretching requires us to stop long enough to give our bodies a break.  If we go too long at an unhealthy pace, we will wear ourselves out.  We have to stop long enough to give ourselves the opportunity to experience repair and restoration.
• Stretching helps us recover from the work we’ve done so far, and it prepares us for the work waiting in front of us.  It’s great to look back and see the fruits of our labor, and it’s great to look ahead with anticipation of working hard.  We must take time in the in-between times to recover from the past and dream about the future.
• Stretching takes time.  We live in a go-go-go society.  We must learn to slow down and take time to take care of ourselves.
• Stretching is worth it.  Stretching almost always produces better results in the end.  If we could simply remember the benefits of stretching, we would embrace it with open arms.

I’m not sure what you have been up to lately.  Maybe you are like me and you have kept a maddening pace this year.  And maybe you still have big hopes for what you hope to see and do during the rest of the year.  Don’t forget to slow down and stretch!

How are you stretching these days?  When was the last time your body told you to slow down?

5 Ways To Represent Well

There is an audio version below.

I was always going to church with my mom, dad and sister. I was literally raised under the godly influence both at home and church. There was no alcohol and no smoking at our house. That was the way a Bowden was supposed to live. My dad always told me to represent the Bowden name in a respectful manner.

Our office received a phone call yesterday from an upset woman.  She was calling to complain about the behavior of one of our employees who was driving one of our company vans.  She wrote down the phone number and van number, and she called in to voice her complaint.

When I received the news, I naturally called my employee to get his side of the story.  After listening to his story, I spoke with him about the importance of representing our company well.  After all, he was driving around in a mobile billboard – a van with our company’s logo plastered in huge letters across the side of his van.

We all are representing something or someone.

I represent the company I work for.  Sometimes people see this on the logo stitched on my coat.  Sometimes they see it as a result of seeing my business card.

I represent my college.  My co-workers know where I went to college, and I want to make sure I am doing my best to represent my school well.

I represent my family and my family name.  I want the Stolpe family name to stand for something good – to represent care, concern, and action.  Whenever I take action (or fail to take action) people are forming their opinion about me and my family.

And finally, I represent my faith.  My prayer every morning is this:  “Lord, help me to represent you well today.”  People will form their opinion about my faith, my God and my Savior based on my words and my actions.  Therefore, it is important for me to speak and act well.

Paul had this to say to the people of Colossi:

And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father.  Colossians 3:17 (NLT)

To help us out in making this a reality in our lives, here are five ways to represent well:

5 Ways To Represent Well

1. Always be thinking of those you represent.  This may take some practice and a lot of discipline.  If you keep this at the forefront of your mind, you will be less likely to say or do something you regret, and you will be more likely to represent well.
2. Ask a few people to keep you in check.  It helps to have people in your life who know the real you.  These are people who can call you out when you say or do something dumb.  They can keep you accountable to keeping your motives pure.  Knowing I have people in my life who will ask me how I’m doing helps me represent well.
3. Look in the mirror.  It’s important to self regulate and self evaluate yourself.  You have to be honest with yourself.  Are your actions, words, and motives pure?  You know the truth.  By looking in the mirror, you will do a better job representing well.
4. Ask yourself if your Grandma would approve of your words and actions.  What would your Grandma say about your words and your actions?  This may cause you to err on the side of caution, but it will help you represent yourself and others well.
5. Apologize when necessary.  We all mess up.  The best way to represent when we mess up is to apologize – to come clean and to admit our failings.  Believe it or not, an apology goes a long way to representing well.

Our actions and words have consequences.  At the office today, I will have to deal with the phone call our office received yesterday.  I know my team member will think differently before he acts in the future, and I think I learned a thing or two through this experience as well.

Represent well!

Who and what are you representing?  How do you represent well?  Share your thoughts in the comments.

10 Benefits Of Taking Cold Showers

There is an audio version below.

There’s nothing quite like a nice, warm shower.

Am I right?

A hot shower relaxes you at the end of a busy day and warms you up on a cool morning.

Have you ever thought of the benefits of taking cold showers instead?

I really hadn’t considered this until I listened to an interview with Nick Loper on the latest episode of the Beyond The To Do List Podcast with Erik J. Fisher.  In the interview, Nick talks about his recent lengthy streak of taking cold showers.  He says cold showers have done wonders to wake him up and speed up his metabolism.

People often attribute cold showers to those who need to settle down (especially sexually).  Maybe this is true, but Erik Fisher’s interview with Nick Loper made me think about some of the possible benefits of a cold shower besides the obvious.  Here’s my list of benefits:

10 Benefits Of Taking Cold Showers

1. Cold showers wake you up and help you be more productive throughout the day.  As Nick Loper shared in the interview, a cold shower will get you going unlike a hot shower.
2. Cold showers boost your metabolism.  If you are looking for a way to burn more calories without doing a lot of work, you should consider taking cold showers.  By taking a cold shower, your body naturally has to do more work to keep itself warm.  This work means more calories burned even while you are sitting still.  A cold shower may help you drop a few pounds or it may give you a bit more margin for that afternoon snack you are always craving.
3. Cold showers reduce your water bill.  You are less likely to stand under a cold shower for a long time.  As a result, you won’t run your water as long and you will save money on your water bill.  My teenage daughter is notorious for taking long showers, and I’ve noticed my water bills climbing the past year or so.  I bet I could shorten her showers by shutting off the hot water during her showers.
4. Cold showers reduce your heating bill.  This goes hand in hand with benefit number three above.  When you don’t need hot water, you don’t need propane, gas, or electric required to heat the water.  Imagine the savings!
5. Cold showers reduce the need to wipe the steam off your mirror.  Doesn’t it get frustrating when the mirrors are all cloudy after you take a long, hot shower.  The easiest way to avoid this problem is by taking cold showers.  A cold shower guarantees you won’t have steam on your mirrors.
6. Cold showers save time.  It’s easy to lose track of time when you’re taking a hot shower.  This isn’t the case when you take a cold shower.  You will most likely take a faster shower which will free you up for other things in your day.
7. Cold showers prepare you for the mission field.  When you are in the mission field, your ability to take a hot shower is often very limited.  I wrote about this in an earlier post.
8. Cold showers prepare you for emergency situations.  Last year, we lost power at our house for 84 hours when Super Storm Sandy blew through our area.  This meant our hot water heater was off for an extended period of time.  The hot water didn’t work, but the shower still worked.  In order to get ready for work, I still needed to clean off with a shower.  I would have been better equipped for this situation if I had practiced with cold showers before the emergency even happened.
9. Cold showers cause you to be grateful.  We take for granted all the luxuries we experience here in the United States.  Cold showers have taught me to be thankful for the many blessings I have like a warm house, a soft bed, a refrigerator and pantry full of food, and clean water.
10. Cold showers actually cool you off after a workout.  Go running or biking.  Do something to start sweating.  After a hard workout, a hot shower doesn’t help you cool down.  I have actually come out of a shower still sweating.  This doesn’t happen thought when I take a cold shower.

Do you take hot showers or cold showers?  What are the benefits you see to each?  Share your answer in the comments.