Still Stretching – Looking Back and Looking Forward

Four years ago on this Wednesday, I started this blog. So far it’s been quite a ride. Here’s how it started 416 posts ago…

Well, this is the start of it all… I’ve been contemplating doing the blog thing for some time. You might be wondering where the“Stretched” thing comes from. For starters, when I was in high school at Rancocas Valley Regional High School, I was short – 5’6″ to start my junior year. Since then, I’ve grown to almost 6’6″. Many of my friends started calling me Stretch. On a more recent basis, I often feel “stretched” by all the things going on around me – career, marriage, parenting, church, running, reading, friendships, extended family, relationship with God, etc. (in no particular order). My hope is that this blog will provide an opportunity to express some of my “stretch marks” and to possibly hear your thoughts as well. So here we go….

When I look back at all the posts and comments since the start, I believe the blog has served this purpose. Here are some of the highlights: family vacations, Supernanny parenting group, Kids Camp and Stretch, the Perelman building, several movies, Elizabeth’s adoption, blog spotlights, book reviews, small group thoughts, and personal wrestlings.  Recently, I’ve also started guest posts which I think will add a lot to my blog experience.

From my tallies, I’ve had over 6600 visits to the blog since I changed to WordPress a couple of years ago, and I’ve had over 300 comments. It’s all pretty amazing.

So where do I go from here? Great question. I think it just continues. I’m quite confident that I will continue to be stretched in the coming year. So get ready, I’m sure I’ll have more stretch marks to share.

Until the next post, I’ll be stretching…

How long have you been blogging?  Why do you blog?  Please feel free to include a link to your blog so others can enjoy.

Detours

Today, I have the privilege of presenting my wife as my guest blogger.  Leanne and I will be celebrating our 15th anniversary in less than two weeks.  We’ve been through a lot together over the years, and I look forward to the adventures that lie ahead.  Her thoughts below are extremely insightful while being very transparent.  Leanne doesn’t blog at the moment, but your comments and feedback may help spur her on to share more of her life and story.

This week I took a day off and went to the beach. This is something I used to do a couple of times a year but recently haven’t done for quite some time. So, it was a big deal to me. I filled up my tank with gas. I packed a picnic lunch, and figured out my directions. I put my tunes in the cd player and started on my trip. I didn’t even get on the turnpike when there was a detour – right at the start of my trip!

It reminded me of how this past year seemed like a detour in many ways.

1. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder after being treated for a bipolar/postpartum psychosis diagnosis for 10 years. My doctor encouraged me to get a second opinion and when I did, the diagnosis was postpartum psychosis. So, I came off my medicine and gradually began having symptoms which led to a severe reaction. I have spent a lot of the year recovering but have found a greater understanding for people who deal with mental illness but also special needs in general, especially as they relate to children.
2. I decided to resign as my position of our church preschool director because I missed the children. I found myself spending most of my working hours behind a desk instead of with the children I love. Through tutoring and subbing this year, I have rediscovered a passion to be with students in the public school.
3. We had to put the trip of my dreams – Africa – on hold, but we have a greater resolve to make a difference in our local community as a family. We are excited for our service group to start-up again this fall. It was also a lesson of control. We quickly learned how much we are not in control of our lives.

In all these things, I am now able to look back and see God working for the good in all things. At the time, life seemed like a series of detours.  A friend asked me the other day if life made sense and for the first time in a while I was able to say that yes, right now it actually did. That doesn’t mean that life is without problems and everything is perfect but there’s faith, recovery, hope, and the support of family and friends.

What detours have you experienced in your life?  How have you seen God working good in your life through the ups and downs?

Running Inspiration – Let Us Run With Perseverance The Race Marked Out For Us

Hannah finishing a race a few years ago.

Yesterday, I posted some tips for those who are thinking about running a longer race for the first time.

As I was processing this post, I was thinking about things that inspire me in my running and in my life.  For example, I’m inspired when I hear stories of people overcoming adversity to reach new heights.  I think that’s why I like movies like Radio, Remember the Titans, and The Blind Side.

I’m also inspired by scripture.  The scripture below is a great reminder to persevere and to keep the right focus.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles.  And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith.  For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.  Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

Hebrews 12:1-3

It is so easy to give up and to lose perspective when we face the challenges of life.  As with my tips yesterday, here are some tips that I have found helpful in keeping my eyes on the prize.

1)  Follow a plan.  God’s Word should be the center of the plan.  I have tried different methods for staying in God’s Word on my own, but I have found that existing plans are most helpful in keeping me on track.  Two plans or programs that I have used recently to help me are YouVersion.com and The Daily Audio Bible.

2)  Find some accountability.  Get plugged into a small group or even a one-on-one relationship where you can be challenged with the tough questions like:  ‘Have you spend time in God’s Word this week?’ and ‘Have you lived with integrity since we last met?’

3)  Cross train and rest.  There are some great resources out there to get the most out of your walk.  I use several Bible-based blogs and books to give me a deeper perspective.  Getting to church on a weekly basis is also important.  This is a chance to be fed and to worship on a larger, corporate level.  Also, take time to rest.  We live very busy lives.  We must take time to reflect and to rest.

4)  Practice.  Practice.  Practice.  Get out and live your life.  Make a concerted effort to go about your daily activities in a way that would honor God.

5)  Set goals but learn to be flexible with God’s direction.  I’m a huge goal oriented person.  Setting goals is a great way to keep focused.  But we also need to be alert to the movement of the Spirit.

6)  Have fun and a positive attitude.  God doesn’t promise that this life will be easy, but we have a choice to make.  We can have a poor attitude when it comes to life’s ups and downs, or we can choose to have a positive attitude.

It’s amazing how these things line up with the tips from yesterday.

So what inspires you in running and in life?  What other tips would you add to the list above?

Time For Some Kick Ball!

Last night, we hosted an impromptu game of kick ball on our front lawn with our neighbors.  I was inclined to do some yard work when I came out of the house after dinner, but I couldn’t resist the chance to get into the game that was starting to form with the neighborhood kids.  It was fun, and it was so nice to hang out with the neighbors and to play with the kids.

It seems like we’re always running in a million different directions, and we miss out on the basic fun and the relationships with those who live close to us.  It would have been easy for me to let this opportunity pass and to continue on with my original agenda.  After kickball, the adults chatted on our front porch while the kids played another game.  It was great to share about the end of the school year and our plans for the summer.

It seems so simple, but these are the times to hold onto.  Our kids grow up so fast.  I want to make the most of the times like this.

What games did you play in your neighborhood as a kid?

Superpower

When I was a kid, I thought it would be so amazing to be able to fly.  I can remember running down the hallway of our house into the living room and jumping into the couch.  I believed that for a brief second I was actually flying.  Believe it or not, I’ve felt that feeling on the basketball court a few times (not recently).  It’s a feeling that you are floating through the air.  But it only lasts for a quick moment.  It doesn’t last.

As a kid, I also played with the idea of being invisible.  Perhaps, this superpower would be more amazing than flying.  You could walk into a room without anyone noticing.  I could sneak into the kitchen and get a bowl of ice cream, and I could eat it undetected – as long as nobody was in the kitchen when I came in to see the freezer open and close.

More recently, I’ve thought that it would be helpful if somehow I could be in multiple places at the same time.  Especially as our kids are involved in different activities, I would love to be at work, be at home, and be at the track meet or other activity all at the same time.  We often joke at the office that the cloning machine is broken.

But in reality, these superpowers remain out of reach.  It’s probably a good idea that we can’t do all these things.  My guess it that we would have a hard time using these powers selflessly.  I’m also guessing that possession of these superpowers would cause us to stray from God.  We would fail to realize the amazing power of our Creator.

 But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. 2 Corinthians 4:7

What superpower would you like to have?  How would this be useful?

Bringing Consistency To My Blog

I’ve been thinking a lot about my blog.  I’d like to get into a routine of writing 4-5 days per week.  I’m thinking that it would be helpful to have a regular schedule for my posts in order to reach this goal.  So here are some of my ideas.

One day could be a family/marriage/parenting focus.  This would be an opportunity to share the “stretch marks” that go into raising my kids, investing in my best friend, and taking our family through life.

One day could be could be a church/ministry/small group focus.  I’m still trying to figure out where I fit into this whole picture, but I know there’s a passion for helping people connect to each other and to God.  This focus would be an opportunity to share the “stretch marks” that hit these areas.

One day could be a guest post.  I value what others have to say about what is “stretching” them.  If you would be interested and willing to put your “stretch marks” out there for the world to see, please leave a comment below.  I’d love to get in touch with you.

One day could be a miscellaneous focus.  The areas above remain primary in my attention, but there are other things that get my brain moving – leadership, blogging, hobbies, personal discipline, and other stretching points.

So this is what’s been on my mind recently.  I’m realizing though that a commitment to blog more consistently will definitely require some thought and sacrifice – and some accountability perhaps.

Do you blog?  Why do you blog?  How regularly do you blog?  Do you have a game plan for blogging on a regular basis?  How has this worked for you?

Temporary Versus Permanent

From my journal dated 5/12/11…

“I was thinking today about how temporary things are in life.  At first, I was thinking of Leanne’s new job.  We are both thankful for this opportunity.  But I get the feeling that Leanne would like it to be more permanent.  Then, I started thinking about my parents.  This Sunday, Dad preaches at a church in San Antonio where he may become their interim pastor until they find a new full-time pastor.  For my parents, this could mean another church family, a new home, and new friends.  But it’s only for a little while.  Then I started thinking of my own job.  I’ve been with Siemens for over 15 years.  I like what I do, and I could see myself working there for a while – maybe until I retire.  But in reality, it’s just a job and it’s just temporary.  All our earthly pursuits and possessions will fade away – they are all temporary.  We long for life to be permanent.  We long to leave a legacy that will outlive us.  We long for the day when we will be truly fulfilled.  I believe that day is coming!”

These were just some of my thoughts from a couple of weeks ago.

What do you long for in life?  What things have you pursued thinking they would bring you fulfillment, but when you reached this goal you were disappointed?  Where have you found fulfillment?

“All people are like grass, and all their faithfulness is like the flowers of the field.  The grass withers and the flowers fall, because the breath of the LORD blows on them.  Surely the people are grass.  The grass withers and the flowers fall, but the word of our God endures forever.”  Isaiah 40:6-8

The Power of the Next Question

A blurb from my journal dated 5/18/11…

“I made it to my men’s group at Limerick Diner after missing it the past few weeks.  It was good to be back.  I was reminded this evening about the importance of asking the ‘next’ question.  So often we ask a basic question, but we don’t follow it up with questions that take us deeper.  Either we’re too lazy or we just don’t care.  I don’t want to be like this.”

Without going into specifics, one of the guys in our group seemed a bit down when we were initially going around the table at the beginning of our time together.  After this initial check-in, our conversation drifted to other subject matters.  My friend’s initial comment was temporarily ignored as we joked around and talked about other things.  It would have been easy to let our time together end without following up.  So often, I fall into this trap.  For some reason towards the end of this time, I asked him what was up – why did he seem down.

It’s amazing the conversation that followed.

It was so worth asking the ‘next’ question.  I think it was an opportunity for our group to rally around our friend.  I think it was a chance for us to be more transparent.  I think it was a chance for us all to grow.  I’m thankful that my friend was willing to open up and share what was troubling him.

As I stated in my journal that night, I don’t want to be too lazy or self focused to ask the ‘next’ question.

So when was the last time someone asked you the next question?  How did it work out?

ReGroup

Last night was a big deal for me.

I’ve been a “small group” junkie for a long time since John Mulpas asked me to lead a “Gel Group” many years ago.  I’ve been inspired by many “group life” champions like Frank Chiapperino, Alyssa Dourte, Bill Search, Bill Donahue, Greg Bowman, Randy Frazee, Heather Zempel, Will Johnston, Dave Treat, and many others.  I truly believe in the power of connection and accountability that comes through living life together with a small group of people.

For many years, I was very active in our church‘s small group ministry.  I led several groups.  I helped to coach small group leaders.  I even led a group of coaches.  I attended several conferences designed to motivate, inspire, and equip small group leaders.  In many ways, I was all small groups – all the time.  But a lot of that changed a couple of years ago. For reasons I don’t need to get into here, I walked away from active small group leadership.  I have continued to keep up with a lot of front line small group thought and information thanks to the wonders of the internet.  I have even taken a more active role as a participant in a couple of groups over the past several months, but I have shied away from taking a leadership role in anything related to small group ministry.

I thought that was going to change last fall when Leanne and I helped to set up a family based service-focused small group, but this changed in September when we were forced to focus on our family as we were faced with some unplanned health obstacles.  Last night, Leanne and I finally had the opportunity to host and lead this group in our home.  We shared a meal of tacos in honor of Cinco de Mayo.  We gathered the kids and adults to discuss what it is like to serve and to be served.  We talked about what it means to be great in the eyes of the world versus great in the eyes of God.  I was invigorated as I had the chance to lead this discussion where kids and adults were able to share.  We finished up our evening with a craft for hospice patients.

We had three new families last night.  It was so exhilarating to see everyone talking together and sharing ideas about how they could serve others together.  At the end of the evening, Leanne and I were so grateful for this opportunity.  We can’t wait for our next meeting – June 7th at our house.  We’ll have a BBQ/picnic, we’ll talk more about what it means to be a servant, and we’ll put our words into action.  Then on the June 21st, we’ll serve our community at the Colonnade in Schwenksville.

For me this was a big deal – worth sharing!

Let me know if you’re interested in joining us.

Hoping to Avoid Journal Jinx

I have tried to journal in the past, but I haven’t had a lot of success with this discipline.  I’m hoping this is changing, and I’m hoping that by posting this on my blog it will not jinx the pattern that I’ve had for the past week.  Since last Friday, I’ve kept a journal by my bedside.  Each night before I shut the light off, I write a couple of pages reflecting on the day that has just past.  (My wife is awesome at this.  She has kept a journal for years.)

I have found this new discipline to be quite refreshing.  Some of the things that I’ve written may make it to my blog, and many things will not make it here.  It has been freeing to release my thoughts from the day onto the blank pages of my journal and to know that I can begin a new day with a new blank page.

In my journal, I’ve written about Isaac turning 11 last week, my thoughts on Apollo 13 (the movie), finding God in the mundane things of life, the joys of a weekend with my family, and my thoughts on temporary versus permanent.  I’ve also used my journal to express my thanks to God along with bringing Him my burdens.

I hope this is something that will continue.  In a small way, I’m hoping that blogging about it will help keep me accountable to this new discipline.

So ask me how I’m doing with my journal when you run into me in person or on the information highway.

Do you journal?  If so, how long have you kept a journal?  What has helped you to stay consistent with your journal?  Does consistency matter?  If you do not journal?  Why not?

I’d love to hear your thoughts!