Category Archives for "stretch"

The Kid Stretches Me – Guest Post by Tom Tarver

Today, A Curious Band Of Others visits The Stretched Blog.  I’m honored to present guest blogger Tom Tarver.  Tom writes about the daily struggles to hear and to do—the building on the rock foundation process—to those who dream bigger dreams about being the church, the body of Christ in motion.  After you read his post below, swing over to his blog and check things out.  Add A Curious Band Of Others to your regular reading.

(If you have a STRETCHED story to share, drop me a comment so we can connect.)

My young friend Richard looked like he’d finished an Ironman Triathlon—face buried in his arms, legs like jelly. There would be no more basketball for him today.

“The first day is always the hardest,” I said. “You’ll feel better after a few days.” I hoped he’d show up again but had my doubts.

Between gasps, he said, “I haven’t played basketball in three years.”

I headed back out to the court for the next game and figured I’d had my last conversation with Richard for the day, perhaps even for the week. Shoot, maybe even the year.

I was wrong on all accounts. Richard trotted out for the morning’s last game. In the final moments, he lunged to save an escaping basketball and tipped it in my direction. I turned and swooshed the game winner.

Richard surpassed all my expectations because I underestimated him in a big way. I shouldn’t by now; because he made a number of exceptional plays on the football team I coached and hustled his heart out on our softball team.

He doesn’t look the part of an athlete—he’s whippet thin but tortoise slow. When players ran routes in full pads, I could distinguish Richard from the other skinny receivers by his foot speed. Forget a stopwatch. You need to clock Richard with a calendar.

But here’s the thing about Richard. He sticks to it (whatever it is—football, softball, basketball, etc.). And I admire him for his resolve. He just doesn’t quit. I’ve seen better, more talented athletes who would be exceptional if they had Richard’s heart.

Richard’s friendship serves to remind me of the prophet Samuel’s visit to Jesse’s home. He came looking to anoint a king and based his initial judgment on appearances. God had another standard.

But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7).

Jesus also spoke about appearances. In John 5, we read about Jesus healing a man on the Sabbath. In John 7, He’s confronted by the Jewish religious leaders. He knows they want to kill Him, have wanted to ever since the Sabbath-day healing, and will kill Him in due time. In that context, Jesus says, “Stop judging by mere appearances, but instead judge correctly” (John 7:24 NIV).

So here are a few takeaway thoughts that stretch me.

1) Value people. Jesus valued people above rules and regulations. He knew the Law was important. In truth, the Law flowed out of God’s character. But why? Because God loves and values people.

2) Go deeper. You know the saying. “Beauty is only skin deep.” I can see skin deep with my physical eyes, but I can’t see any further than that. Everything I take in visually—what he wears, how she fixes her hair, his height, her complexion, etc.—is mere appearance. Hollywood has built a successful industry primarily on eye appeal. But for us, living in obedience to the Lord, we must go deeper than the skin.

3) Gaze upon the heart. How many times have you assigned a motive to another person because he angered you? How many times have you stopped a conversation with “That’s stupid” or something worse? Whether I’ve said it or not, I’ve certainly thought it. To get to the heart of a person or a matter, I have to slow down and think. For me, that means gaze instead of glimpse.

What’s true for me in relation to Richard remains true for me in my relationship with God. I must go deeper than my circumstances, whether good or bad, to know God’s heart. I must gaze upon Him in Scripture, in worship, and in life to understand the depth of His love for me. Even then, I may only get a glimpse of His glory. But, with God, a glimpse is more than I deserve and more than enough.

Questions: What kind of person does God use to stretch you?

You Are Here

 

I took this picture last year while on a Cub Scout field trip to the Franklin Institute.  This sign was located in a stairwell between exhibits.  I just thought it was funny.  What can I say?  This is my humor, and you’re stuck with it if you’re still reading my blog.

As I think about the sign, “You Are Here,” I think it’s a good reminder for me.  Sometimes, it can be easy to get stuck in our past –  where we dwell on either our victories or defeats.  Let’s face it, we often like the way things were just because that’s what we’re used to.  Does that make sense?

On the other hand, sometimes, it can be easy to get caught up in the worries (and hopes) of the future.  I think it’s good to have hopes and dreams and to go after them.  But sometimes, we deal with anxiety because we’re so focused on what might happen in the future.  We are crippled by questions which have answers that are out of our control.

As I think about this, two passages come to mind:

He says, “Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.”  Psalm 46:10

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes?  Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?  Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?

“And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin.  Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these.  If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith?  So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’  For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.  But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.  Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”  Matthew 6:25-34

These offer great reminders to rejoice in today – this moment in time when the past is in the past, and God holds the future in His hands.

I am here.  Where are you?

Stretched Perspective

I don’t like change.

I’m a man of routine and discipline.  I get up at 4:40AM.  I spend time in God’s Word.  I read.  I blog.  I exercise.  I eat a bowl of cereal.  I shower and get ready for work.  I drive the same way to the office.  And my day continues.

It drives me crazy when things get switched around with the patterns that exist in my life.

I came home from work last night excited to see my family and hungry for dinner.  We were having leftovers which doesn’t bother me at all.  In fact, I like to eat the same things we ate earlier in the week.  (I usually eat the same exact thing for lunch every day – yogurt, cheese stick, granola bar, and two pieces of fruit.)

When we sat down for dinner, I was “directed” away from MY normal seat at the dinner table to a new seat.  My wife said I needed a change in perspective.  I’ll admit that I was reluctant to sit anywhere besides MY normal spot at the table.  But I have also come to realize that a change in perspective can STRETCH me to experience new things, to see things that I would normally miss, and to walk in other people’s shoes.

My “new” spot at the dinner table wasn’t all that bad – except for the glass of water my son spilled on me.  We joked that my new perspective was a wet perspective.

How can you change your perspective today?  How could a change in perspective change things for you?  How could this change STRETCH you?

Stretching To A New Focus – Guest Post by Leah Adams

Today, The Stretched Blog features guest blogger, Leah Adams.  Leah blogs over at The Point.  I’m grateful to share Leah’s story about how she feels STRETCHED these days.  As always, stop over to her blog after you read her post.  Become one of her regular readers.  Leah’s bio and contact information are at the bottom of this post.

(If you are feeling that STRETCHING feeling these days, I’d love to share your STRETCHING experience here.  Drop me a line if you’re interested in becoming a guest blogger.)

I think God is the originator of the concept of stretching. He never lets us be comfortable for very long before He sends us a challenge designed to stretch our faith in Him.

So it is with me and the ministry He called me to several years ago. My passion is speaking. Specifically, my passion is teaching the Word of God. The focus of that passion has been speaking to women about the love and grace of Jesus. That is what God has allowed me to do for the past four years.

Now, it seems that He has decided it is time for Leah to S-T-R-E-E-E-E-T-C-H. In the past year the Lord has sparked a fire in my heart for young men and women in the 16 to 29 age range. Why this group? Probably, because this is a hugely unreached group with regard to the church. It all started when I read David Kinnaman’s book entitled unchristian: What A New Generation Really Thinks About Christianity and Why It Matters. Peeps, we are losing this generation of young people from the church and it is primarily because we, in the church, often do not act like Christ would have acted. We don’t love like Christ. We don’t care like Christ. Because of that, WE are driving young people away from the church by the thousands.

Last fall, I had the opportunity to become involved with a couple who do ministry to international students studying in the US. Oh my word! My eyes were opened to a huge, wide open mission field. There are thousands of students from other countries studying in the United States and over 90% of them are never inside an American home. What a missed opportunity to share Jesus’ love!

These students are eager to learn about American culture and engage with American people, yet, we never take the time to get to know them, show them we care, be there for them if they have a problem. We could so easily be surrogate family to these students who are thousands of miles away from home, yet the church of Jesus is often oblivious to them.

There is a small, four year college very near my home in rural northern Georgia. I called over to the admissions office one day in the fall of 2011 and asked if they had any international students. I figured I was wasting my time, but felt the urging of the Lord to call, so I did. I was stunned when they told me they had 38 international students. Thirty eight international students right on my doorstep! My heart did back-flips.

My Tuesday morning Bible study ladies and I have begun to engage with these students. We took them goodies bags during fall semester final exams. We did a meet and greet with them. In late February we plan to do a bonfire and marshmallow roast for them. A bowling trip. Provide rides to the grocery for them. Movie night. Anything we can do to show them friendship and love is what we plan to do.

Last week I sat with one young man—and when I say young man, I mean probably 18 years old at the most—who had been at the local college for only 2 weeks. He was a soft-spoken runner from Kenya. We talked about how he likes America, his scholarship to run, and when he would go back home to visit. He told me he would not go back for 5 years. FIVE STINKING YEARS without seeing his family! I nearly bawled right in front of him. He is just a baby and he will be in a strange foreign country where he knows no one for 5 years. He held back tears as we spoke, too.

Ya’ll, this is low hanging fruit as far as I am concerned. These young men and women are so hungry for love and family. To show the love of Jesus to these students is my new passion and it is how God is S-T-R-E-T-C-H-I-N-G me.

How have you been STRETCHED in your focus recently?

BIO

Leah describes herself as the “prodigal son’s sister” after spending several years walking far from the Lord in her twenties. Helping others understand the grace that is offered by Jesus to anyone who will accept it is the passion of Leah’s heart. In a works-based and failure-prone society, grace is a concept that many people have difficulty grasping and Leah’s speaking and writing ministry, called The Point Ministries, seeks to point others straight to Jesus and his amazing grace.

An anointed speaker and communicator, Leah lives in northern Georgia with her husband, Greg, who is also her dentist. She holds a Doctor of Pharmacy Degree from Mercer University School of Pharmacy. Leah is a CLASS certified speaker and is the author of a Bible study for ladies entitled, From the Trash Pile to the Treasure Chest: Creating a Godly Legacy. She writes for Internet Café Devotions, CBN.com and Christianparenting.org. Visit Leah at her ministry website at www.leahadams.org. Find Leah on Facebook at Leah Colwell Adams and on Twitter (@PointMinistries).

Who’s [on] First?

I love the Abbott and Costello skit where the comedy pair go back and forth about the names of baseball players on a team.  The skit starts and ends with “Who’s on first!”

The skit is very funny, and it’s what initially comes to mind when I think of Jesus’ teaching from Matthew 19 and 20…

But many who are first will be last, and many who are last will be first.  Matthew 19:30

So the last will be first, and the first will be last.  Matthew 20:16

Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave.  Matthew 20:26-27

Clearly, Jesus is calling His followers to serve others.  Three times in a short period, Jesus tells His followers to pursue being last.  This is so contrary to our society where everyone is driven to outdo and out-position each other.  Jesus tells us to serve others and we will naturally (or supernaturally) gain the first position.

I’m an extremely competitive person, I strive to win.  I strive to be number one.  I strive to be first.  Reading these words in Matthew a few days ago provided a great reminder for me personally.  I’m sure I’ve written about it in the past, but it’s so easy to put myself first.  When people ask the question, “Who’s first?”  I admittedly want the answer to be Jon Stolpe.

Selfish.  Prideful.  Short-sighted.

Interestingly, the things we (I) strive for first place in are often shallow.  They are things that fade away – things that don’t last.  Jesus’ words point towards things that matter – things that are eternal – things that don’t make sense to the “Me First” generation.  Great reminders for me today.

Getting back to Abbott and Costello, who’s [on] first in your life today?


February 4, 2012 Week in Review

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This week, I’m going back to a written recap as opposed to the video “throw down” that went on last weekend.  (Thanks for the feedback, I don’t think video posting is dead for me, but I need to take it in steps.)

At any rate, it was a pretty good week here on The Stretched Blog.  Traffic was on par with other weeks (maybe a bit higher than average).  Comments seemed to be up from previous weeks.  I’m not sure if the topics covered in the posts were more engaging or if more people decided to add more feedback to the community.

Here’s a run-down on the posts from the week:

Here’s some of my favorites from around the blog world this week:

Don’t forget to subscribe to The Stretched Community on the right of the main screen.  Also, stop over and join Jon Stolpe Stretched on the Facebook Fan Page.  Thanks as always to the regular readers and to those who leave comments.  You make this Stretched community so great!

How was your week?  What was your favorite post on your blog and elsewhere this week?  Please share, so we can all enjoy!

 

Log Eye Lessons

Last night, our family devotion was titled Log Eye.  The devotion was about judging others, and the title came from Jesus’ comments about removing the plank in our eye before we call out the speck in the eye of someone else.

“Do not judge, or you too will be judged.  For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.

“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?  How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?  You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”  Matthew 7:1-5

As we sat around the dinner table, we talked about what this means and how it applies to each of us.

The night before, I had snapped at Hannah for picking on and nagging her brother.  Hannah was scolding Isaac for putting too much hot sauce in his soup.  So I scolded Hannah telling her that she wasn’t the parent and that she didn’t need to get on Isaac’s case for how much hot sauce he wanted to use.

Hannah quickly stopped, and the conversation was over.  But it still went on in my head.  I felt awful for jumping down Hannah’s throat.  As I thought more about it, I remembered having similar interactions with my brother.  As the oldest brother, I always believed that I knew best.  Throughout the day, I pondered how much Hannah and I are really alike, and I realized that this can sometimes create friction between the two of us.

I see some of my faults in Hannah, and I cringe when I see my attitudes echoed by my daughter.  I cringe because it reminds me of me.

The whole Log Eye discussion gave me a great opportunity to apologize to Hannah.  I couldn’t see clearly with the log in my eye!  I’m blessed to have a wonderful daughter who keeps me humble and a loving Father who is full of mercy.

Do you struggle with judging others? 

How has God used your kids to teach you?

Book Review: Jolt! by Phil Cooke

This weekend, I finished reading my second book of the year – Jolt! by Phil Cooke.  (Hopefully, I can keep this momentum going.)

I had never heard of Jolt! or Phil Cooke before I received a free copy of this book thanks to Brandon Gililland who gave me a copy as part of a contest he was running on his blog.  Thanks, Brandon!

The subtitle for Phil Cooke’s book is “Get the jump on a world that’s constantly changing.”  In Jolt!, Cooke provides his take on how to keep up with what keeps changing in today’s world, while staying grounded and energized.  The book is broken up into five sections which encourage readers to “jolt” different parts of their lives and perspective.  Cooke encourages readers to “jolt” their direction, “jolt” what matters, “jolt” their potential, “jolt” their heart, and “jolt” their future.

Many parts of this book seemed to echo others books that I’ve read encouraging readers to have goals, stay focused, and adapt to change.  I didn’t find any parts of the book shocking or extremely “jolting”, but I was challenged and stretched by the reminders.  I liked the way Cooke integrated quotes and personal stories to demonstrate his points.  I also appreciated the application to my work.  Jolt! stretched me to be more intentional when it comes to encouraging creative thinking and independent decision-making in my department.  Jolt! also stretched me personally to keep learning, keep giving, and keep accountability in my life.

All in all, I give Jolt! four “stretch marks” out of five.  I’d recommend this book whether you need a kick in the pants related to your personal or business growth.  You can purchase a copy of Jolt! by clicking the link below.  Also, consider jumping over to Phil Cooke’s blog for more insight.

When was the last time you were shocked or jolted?  How did that go?  What needs a good “jolt” in your life right now?

January 29, 2012 Week In Review

Hello, Stretched Community!  I’m going to try something new with this week’s recap post.  Let me know what you think in the comments.

This week’s STRETCHED posts:

Blog spotlight links:

Call to action:

  • Subscribe to the blog (on the right side of the main page).
  • Connect with the Jon Stolpe Stretched Facebook Fan Page (for great links to other blogs throughout the week).
  • Consider guest posting here.  Send my your Stretched ideas!
  • Consider advertising here on The Stretched Blog (see the links on the right side of the main page).

Finally… have a great week!

How was your week?  What was good, bad, or ugly on your blog this week?  What links to you have to share with the Stretched community this week?


 

Our Behavior Is Our Witness – Guest Post by Kevin Stone

Today, I’m privileged to present guest blogger, Kevin Stone.  Kevin is the executive pastor at the church I attend.  He comes to our church from corporate America where he held key leadership positions at a few larger companies.  If you follow the Myers-Briggs temperament tests, Kevin and I share the same ESTJ personality type.  Kevin blogs regularly about leadership and about the happenings at our church.  You can follow him on his blog and on Twitter.  I’d encourage you to stop by executivepastoronline.com and become a subscriber and a regular reader of his blog!

(I love to share STRETCH stories on The Stretched Blog.  If you’re interested in guest posting, drop me a comment!)

Our Behavior is Our Witness

I definitely remember one of the things that stretched me most as a new believer. It wasn’t changing stuff that I had done previously, like eating too much, drinking too much, using bad language, looking a little too long at a beautiful lady walking by, etc. It wasn’t beginning to spend time in my Bible or doing some type of daily devotional, in prayer and meditation. It certainly wasn’t regularly attending church and serving; I love going to church and I definitely love to serve!

So, what was it, you say? It was learning how to “be Jesus” in day-to-day situations, especially at work. How do I actually “love” people who I previously couldn’t stand? How do I behave in a way that honors God even though God centered behavior very often flies in the face of the workplace norm?

Before becoming an Executive Pastor I spent more than 20 years in corporate America. (You can read the About page of my blog if you’re interested in the details.) I remember one particular leadership position with a company with a working environment “norm” that included lots of behavior that would challenge any well intending Christ follower. It was perfectly OK and very normal to turn one’s head, watching an attractive woman walking by. Use of lots of choice language in conversations with others was normal. It was even normal in fairly high level meetings. It was more than acceptable for a group of executives to follow a business dinner with a trip to one of the city’s “Gentlemen’s Clubs.” It wasn’t even out of the ordinary to see a married coworker spending a little too much time with another woman, if you get my meaning, while on a business trip.

As a Christ follower, I had to find a way not to become a “weird Christian” while not violating any of my principles in terms of my behavior. I didn’t want to be weird or “preachy” to my coworkers, but I did want to be noticeably different opening doors for sharing my faith with others. So, I drew the line as it related to my own behavior. I didn’t criticize the behavior of others. I just made sure that my behavior was fitting for a person who believes in Jesus. When the heads were turning to check out a nice looking young woman, my head wasn’t one of them. It was difficult, but I kept thinking, “What would that lady think if she knew I was watching her walk away?” Or, “What would my wife say if she saw me looking?” When I spoke, I somehow found a way to express myself without using some of the choice expletives that my coworkers normally used. I kept a healthy distance from women while still doing my job. I only went to lunch with female coworkers if others were along with us. I avoided business trips with just me and a female coworker. And, I definitely always went home after business dinners while others were headed for the strip club.

Did this create a little “separation” between my boss, most of my coworkers, and me? Definitely yes! It never got in the way of promotions, bonuses, or other positive recognition, though. In fact, my boss had a lot of respect for me. I remember the first time we talked about my passion for Jesus and the church. He was, I think, impressed. In fact, now (years later) he regularly attends church with his wife! Pretty cool!

The bottom line is this: Jesus told us to evangelize the world. He didn’t tell us to separate ourselves from the rest of the world. In fact, he told us to go into the world. In order to do that, we must stay “normal.” What do normal people do? They listen to normal music. They have fun doing stuff that others enjoy doing. Of course they are also doing stuff that God would like to see them stop doing. And, they need us to introduce them to Jesus so he can change them. If we’re “freaky Christians” we’ll never get close enough to another to actually have an impact on them. They’ll think we’re weird and just stay away from us.

We need to learn that we can’t change the behavior of others. We can only control what we do, and we need to allow Jesus to change us which helps our “different” behavior to open doors and create opportunities to share our faith with others.

So what do you think?  How has your behavior been a witness to others?

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