Growth Doesn’t Happen By Accident

I made a decision to shrink my garden this year.  I am just way too busy in this season of my life to keep up with my normally ambitious garden.  This year my garden will be about one-third the size of last year.  I will be using the square-foot gardening method to make the most of the space which now consists of four four-by-eight foot garden beds.  One of the beds is dedicated to asparagus, and a quarter of another bed is dedicated to horseradish.  This means I have approximately eighty square feet of garden space to plant.

Last night, Leanne and I planted two kinds of lettuce, spinach, swiss chard, and kale.  I’ll do another planting in 10 to 14 days.  Around Mother’s Day, I will plant tomatoes, peppers, beans, and a few other vegetables that require warmer temperatures.

I like the work that goes into a productive garden.  And I like the produce that eventually comes as the temperatures get warmer (as long as I keep the deer and groundhogs out of the garden).  Produce will not happen unless I put the effort in to plant the seeds.   A productive garden does not happen by accident.

This is true for many things in life.

My kids will not automatically turn out respectful and well-adjusted unless my wife and I put the work into them planting seeds that point them in the right direction.

My career will not just move in a desired direction unless I put the effort into it and take time to learn the skills and embrace the experience required to take me there.

My faith will not grow unless I take time to feed my soul with God’s Word and unless I plug into other believers who will spur me on to greater heights.

In all areas of our life, growth does not happen without hard work, without planting the right things into our lives, and without stretching ourselves.

How have you experienced growth in your life recently?  What do you attribute to this growth?

Where do you need to grow right now?  What’s stopping you from growing?

Thrust Into Greatness

I’ve been coming to Toastmasters for nearly a year, and I’ve been moving along at a decent pace as I progress towards the first major milestones – Competent Communicator (CC) and Competent Leader (CL).

I was a little apprehensive about taking on this role considering my lack of experience in the club and in the overall organization, but no one else seemed ready or excited about stepping into the role.  During the selection process, someone even voiced their concern about my lack of Toastmasters experience.

Sometimes we have to step up.  If we wait for others to take action, we may be waiting a long time.

I don’t know exactly what the year ahead looks like as I take on the responsibilities of this position.  I want to see our club continue.  I truly believe it is having a positive impact on those who are active.  I know it has had an impact on me.  It’s time for me to step up, to lead, and to pursue greatness.

One thing is sure, I’m sure I will STRETCH as a result of this opportunity.

Have you ever had a position of responsibility thrust upon you?  Tell us about your experience in the comments.

[Note:  If you are interested in being part of Aetna Articulators, we meet the 2nd and 4th Wednesdays of the month from Noon until 1PM at Aetna in Blue Bell, PA.  For more information, click here.  If our club doesn’t work out for you, check out the Toastmasters International site for details about other clubs.]

Photo credit: JillWillRun on Flickr CC

Forced To Slow Down And Stretch

I have a bulging disc in my lower back.  Most of the time it’s fine, but every once in a while it flares up.  For some reason, my back decided to flare up yesterday as I was getting up from my desk at work after sitting for a while.

Maybe I was sitting weird for too long, or maybe my back simply tightened up after my morning workout and cold shower.  Whatever the case, I will have to take a few days off from my more strenuous workouts to rest my back and to stretch it out.  Usually, I can get back into the swing of things in a few days.

I’ve been on a pretty good streak of working out this year.  Yesterday was the 84th day of the year, and I have managed to exercise 68 days so far.  This means I’ve worked out nearly 81% of the days this year.  If I keep this up, I’ll workout 295 days this year.

Sometimes our bodies are telling us to slow down.

The past week or so, I have been feeling particularly tired and worn out.  Perhaps, you’ve sensed this in my recent blog posts.

• Stretching requires us to stop long enough to give our bodies a break.  If we go too long at an unhealthy pace, we will wear ourselves out.  We have to stop long enough to give ourselves the opportunity to experience repair and restoration.
• Stretching helps us recover from the work we’ve done so far, and it prepares us for the work waiting in front of us.  It’s great to look back and see the fruits of our labor, and it’s great to look ahead with anticipation of working hard.  We must take time in the in-between times to recover from the past and dream about the future.
• Stretching takes time.  We live in a go-go-go society.  We must learn to slow down and take time to take care of ourselves.
• Stretching is worth it.  Stretching almost always produces better results in the end.  If we could simply remember the benefits of stretching, we would embrace it with open arms.

I’m not sure what you have been up to lately.  Maybe you are like me and you have kept a maddening pace this year.  And maybe you still have big hopes for what you hope to see and do during the rest of the year.  Don’t forget to slow down and stretch!

How are you stretching these days?  When was the last time your body told you to slow down?

Ice Breaker – Year of Stretch

Fridays are Ice Breaker days here on The Stretched Blog.  Before we get to this week’s question, I want to ask you to help me out by answering five questions related to short-term missions.  The survey was initially presented on the blog yesterday, but I understand some had trouble completing the survey on the blog.  After answering the Ice Breaker below, please click here to go directly to the survey.  It will only take a minute (I promise).

Each week on The Stretched Blog, I ask an ice breaker question. The questions are designed to help us get to know each other here in The Stretched Community. I’ll provide my answer to the question here in the post, and then you can leave your response in the comments. While you’re in the comments section, see how others answered the ice breaker question.

(I’m always looking for Ice Breaker question ideas.  If you have an idea, send me an email at jon@jonstolpe.com.  If I use your question, I’ll give you credit and share your links.)

Many of us set goals for the new year.  Just over a week ago, you probably started or restarted some healthy routines.  Hopefully, you are still at it.  This week’s Ice Breaker question provides an opportunity to cast vision for your future.

Question:  What will it look like for you at the end of 2015 if you are really stretched this year?

My Answer:  I could go several different directions in answering this week’s question.  Looking ahead to the end of 2015, I will be stretched, and it will look something like this:  (1) I will have dunked a basketball again (see last week’s Ice Breaker), (2) I will have written my second book, and (3) I will have helped to build another house in Guatemala.

All three of these are major stretches for me.  I can barely touch the rim right now on a ten foot basket, and I’ll have to gain back nine inches or so to my vertical leaping ability.  After writing my first book last year, I now understand the work it takes to write a book.  This goal scares me, and I know it will be a stretch to complete this before the end of 2015.  Finally, I don’t currently have a trip planned to Guatemala, yet I believe God has given me a vision to impact others by building homes in Guatemala.  We’ll see what happens.

Answer this week’s ice breaker question by leaving a comment. I look forward to reading your response! (As always, feel free to share links.) And keep Stretching!

As a reminder, please take a minute to fill out the short-term missions survey.  To get to the survey, click here.

Goals – Reflect and Revision

Besides taking several days off between the Christmas and New Year’s holidays, I get to spend more time with my family.  We’ll be traveling out to Western PA to celebrate with my wife’s family.  I also like this time, because it gives me time to reflect on the past year and to look forward to the year ahead.

I’m a big goal setting person.  It helps me to stay on task with stretching towards things that keep me growing and learning.

For example, my 2014 goal list included exercising 250 days, running 1500 miles, and writing a book about track and field.  Today, I will hit my 250th day of exercise.  I am just 10 miles shy of my mileage goal, so I should surpass that later this week.  And I wrote and self-published my first book, On Track: Life Lessons from the Track & Field in April.

There were a few goals I didn’t reach, and I’m okay with this.

I’ll be reviewing my list, and making new ones in the next week and a half.

I think it’s good to have goals, but it’s also good to frame them from the right mindset.

In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps.  Proverbs 16:9

I want my goals to be in-line with bringing glory to God.  I think he wants us to stretch and grow personally, and I think he wants to draw us closer to Him.

As we approach the year ahead, this is a great time to sit down, reflect, and revision the year ahead.

Be intentional about the year ahead.  Live your life on purpose.  Set goals, and go after them!

Are you planning to set goals for 2015?  What is one of your goals for the year ahead?  How did you do on your goals for 2014?

On Public Speaking…

When I was seven years old, I had some thoughts of becoming a pastor.  My Sunday school teacher used to refer to me as the little evangelist.  My Dad is a pastor.  I like to help people.  I like to encourage people.  And there is part of me that may have thought preaching was pretty cool.

When I was nine or ten years old, I was convinced I would be an actor when I grew up.  After all, I played a lead role in a church musical when I was in third grade.  Then I directed and acted in a play in the fourth grade.

In junior high and high school, I excelled at the saxophone.  My freshmen year, I earned first chair honors beating out upperclassmen who expected to have top honors.  I enjoyed being in the spotlight when I had the opportunity for solos.

My interests turned to engineering, and I put my ambitions for being in the spotlight aside.  In fact, I did my best to stay out of the “public eye” as much as possible.  Part of it was an attempt at humility, and part of it was a growing discomfort for speaking in public.

Despite this, I had different opportunities to speak in front of an audience – at church, at work, at graduate school.  My speaking opportunities weren’t flawless, but I received many compliments and words of encouragement to keep going.

My writing over the past few years has caused me to rethink the whole public speaking thing.  This is part of the reason I joined Toastmasters earlier this year.  Since joining Toastmasters, I’ve had the opportunity to speak at my job, and I’ve been asked to speak at my college in February.

I believe I have something to say – something worth sharing.  And speaking in public may be one way to share.

What if speaking was a direction I should pursue?

This is a question I have started wrestling with more recently.  I think it would be an opportunity to stretch myself.  I think it would also provide an opportunity to encourage others to stretch.

What do you think?  Would you be interested in hearing me speak?

When was the last time you spoke in public?  Tell me about it in the comments.

Finding A New Normal – 5 Keys For Adapting To Change

What’s normal anyway?  For those of you who know me, you probably know I’m not a big fan of change.  I like things the way they are.  This can be a problem though.  Life requires us to stretch and grow.  Change is inevitable.  Kari Scare provides some great insights today to help you adapt to life’s changes.  After you read the post and answer her questions in the comments, I hope you’ll head over to her blog and see more great writing.  For more information about Kari including her blog link, see her bio at the end of the post.

Finding A New Normal

A while back right after an uneventful 3-mile run, I experienced sudden and severe pain in my hip accompanied by a knotted muscle and a limp.

In response, I did what I normally do (and what usually works) when experiencing pain and discomfort after exercise… rested, iced, medicated and stretched. Unfortunately, my normal approach didn’t work. Several months later, I finally admitted I needed to try a new approach.

After consulting my doctor and doing some research, I added the use of a foam roller to my normal routine. While more uncomfortable than stretching (it was somewhat painful, actually), the foam roller got directly at and finally resolved the knot. Hip pain no longer plagues me.

Only when I got outside of my normal routine, when I decided to try something new, did I not only find resolution to the cause of my pain, but also discovered a new and improved normal.

When Normal Fails to Work

Ever find yourself in a place where what normally works fails to work? It’s that place where usual patterns of thinking and approaches to working through life’s struggles simply no longer produce expected results.

All of a sudden, effectiveness becomes illusive. You may still move through normal routines, but they feel flat, maybe even pointless and possibly painful.

I’ve been to this place physically, mentally and spiritually on more than one occasion and each time found the only way out existed only through finding a new normal.

How to Find a New Normal

The frustration of hip pain only resolved after pushing through the limits of my normal routine to discover a new normal. Using a foam roller now exists as a regular part of my exercise routine and also provides a constant reminder of the need to adapt to life’s changing seasons, even if doing so involves pain and discomfort.

If we always do what we’ve always done even though the circumstances around us change, we’ll eventually fail to experience effectiveness. Instead, we must continually look at what’s working and not working and be willing to find a new normal allowing us to operate at our best.

Finding a new normal requires adapting to life’s changing seasons, and this means…

1. Admitting the need. Refuse to get stuck in a normal routine. Realize and then admit when normal no longer works in order to open the door for stretching that leads to growth.
2. Getting outside help. Avoid getting so ingrained in habits and routines that seeing needed changes is impossible. Talk to others, objectively getting ideas for change, and receive the input required for future effectiveness.
3. Being teachable. Realizing the need for change and knowing what needs changed remains useless when a person remains unwilling to change. Being teachable involves a willingness to find a new normal and to adapt to life’s inevitable changing seasons.
4. Getting comfortable with being uncomfortable. All too often, we know we need to change and we even know what needs changed, but we still fail to make the changes. Why? We’re too comfortable in our habits. Be willing to let go of the old normal to find a more effective one.
5. Staying aware of changing seasons. Find ways to continually stay aware of what’s not working and what is working. Look for ways to stay challenged and to confront any ineffective normals preventing effectiveness.

At first I resisted changing my normal routine, even when it wasn’t working, but chronic pain forced me to see my need for a new normal. Unfortunately, only after months of my body screaming desperately for change did I become teachable and willing to change.

Discomfort does sometimes indicate a need to pull back and rest. Sometimes, though, it indicates a need to seek a new normal, to adjust to the changing seasons of life. As we push through the discomfort (and sometimes pain) of finding this new normal, we will discover the benefits of increased effectiveness and productivity too.

How do you adjust to life’s changing seasons? How do you stay aware of those changing seasons?

Kari Scare blogs about ways to live in victory while still struggling on this side of Heaven.  Her blog, Struggle to Victory, will challenge you and inspire you to make small changes which will lead to a big difference, to be perfected through Biblical principles, to live life with determination, curiosity, intentionality, simplicity, and balance.  She has a story worth reading and sharing with others.  Go check it out!

Living In Our Sacred Spaces

What do you consider sacred?  Aidan Rogers shares a story which will have you stretching and thinking about what it means to be sacred.  Her story telling is beautiful.  I hope you’ll read her post, answer her questions in the comments, and head over to visit her blog.  For more information about Aidan, see the bio at the end of the post.

Sacred Spaces

“Would you provide a benediction on the 5^th?”

It was a simple question my mother asked me, and I responded without hesitation.

“No.”

She shook her head and walked away, and I reached over to grab the television remote. I had been working on the 5^th in my head for at least a month. It was our first big family reunion since the matriarch of our family, my great-grandmother, had us all down on the farm twenty years ago. Back then, I was just a little girl. Today, not so much.

I had planned to spend the 5^th just staying out of trouble. Trying to be a better, more grown-up version of myself. Trying to establish myself as a strong, but fun, young woman, a good friend, an enjoyable presence. I had planned to spend the 5^th trying to relax and just be myself. To let my family, who I don’t get to see as often as I like, see who I really am.

The irony is that who I really am is a newly-ordained Masters of Divinity student working her way toward board certification as a chaplain, all because God has called me to share life’s sacred moments with people.

I regretted my “no” as soon as I said it.

I think sometimes, the difficulty of having people close to you is that you start to relax around them. They get to see your good and your bad, who you are when you’re relaxing and not trying to really be anything. They get to know sort of your baseline and how you operate. They see you in your natural state.

The people you share your space with know so many of your secrets, it’s hard to remember to show them your sanctified side, too. It’s hard to remember they need to see you in more than your natural state; they need to see you in your created state, as you were really intended to be.

So often when we’re trying to make an impression on this world, at least for me, we’re tempted to stretch ourselves ever thinner. We push out into wider circles, step out into bigger spaces. We reach for the horizon and, if we’re lucky, we touch it, for however brief a moment. But I think sometimes we’d be better off digging deeper instead of reaching broader. Putting down roots instead of growing branches. Standing firm on our own two feet and declaring who we were meant to be.

There’s a trick to this, and it sounds a bit callous. We have to stop living for those around us. The people we share our sacred space with, those closest to us, they have a front row seat to our growing process. They see clearly our hypocrisy, our fallen moments, our weaknesses. They know all our secrets, and it’s too easy to live a shallow life hoping they won’t call us on it. If we don’t profess a bigger thing for ourselves, nobody really notices our little things. But we can’t let this keep us from the depth of all we are.

We have to live, particularly in our sacred spaces, for the God who calls us. We have to live listening to His whisper. We have to live knowing who He’s created us to be and claiming that, even if we don’t get it perfectly right. Our families, our friends, our loved ones need to see us not just reaching out to our world but reaching into our hearts.

The 5^th came and went, and you know? It was pretty nice. I spent the day serving, laughing, and loving. I spent the day owning my weaknesses and stepping into my insecurities, taking every opportunity to immerse myself in the beauty of family, a treasure I am just coming to understand in my young life. And just as we all gathered round to start to eat, I prayed a benediction over my family like it was something I was called to do.

I barely remember what I was so worried that people might say if I dared to pray in front of them. But almost to a man, my family gathered ’round me said what I had hoped they would say:

What would it mean for you to touch your heart instead of just touching your world? What if you stretched down deep? Who needs to see that from you?

Shut It Off – A Reminder to Find Times of Quiet in Your Day

It has been a while since I featured a video blog post.  Today seemed like a good time to bring it back.  I share some thoughts following my morning run.

It’s true.  We don’t take time to shut off the noise in our lives, yet this is such an important discipline.  It’s important to practice the discipline of quietness, solitude, and listening.

I hope you’ll be encouraged today to take time to turn off the radio, take off the headphones, put down the lid on the laptop, and listen to the quiet.

When was the last time you shut off the noise?  What did that look like for you?  And why would you encourage others to practice the discipline of quietness?

If it’s been a while, what is one thing you can do TODAY to carve out a time of quietness?

3 Ways to Stretch Yourself Starting TODAY

The last few days, I’ve been dealing with soreness and tightness in my right leg.  I think I may have overdone it a bit on a quick run with my daughter on Sunday.  As the soreness begins to subside, I am reminded that I need to keep stretching.  Stretching is essential to maintaining flexibility and to recovering more quickly following strenuous activity.

A friend from work heard about my tightness, and he send me over some stretching exercises he has been using for the past year.  The exercises can be found on the Runner’s World website by clicking here.

I did these exercises for the first time yesterday morning for the first time following my run.  By the evening, I could definitely tell there was a difference.  My leg wasn’t as tight as it had been the day before.

It makes me chuckle to realize I’ve been slacking on my stretching following my runs.  After all, shouldn’t a guy named Stretch be more diligent in his post run stretching?

Stretching is important for all of us.  Obviously, we need to stretch to maintain our flexibility.  We also need to stretch ourselves to keep growing and developing into the people we are called to be.  With this in mind, here are some suggestions for ways you can stretch yourself this week:

3 Ways to Stretch Yourself Starting TODAY

1. STRETCH yourself by reading a book or listening to a podcast.  You can stretch your mind by intentionally filling it with good things.  There are many great books, blogs, and podcasts worth checking out.  I’m currently reading a book called Buy This Land about Chinese-American who found his calling in Guatemala.  What are you reading?  How are you stretching your mind?
2. STRETCH yourself by trying something new.  If you are like me, it’s easy to fall into the trap of routine.  It doesn’t have to be skydiving, but it could be something else that stretches you outside your comfort zone.  As I’ve mentioned recently, I joined Toastmasters in an effort to work on my public speaking and leadership.  This is a new adventure, and it’s definitely stretching me.  What is something new you are doing in your life?  How is this stretching you?
3. STRETCH yourself by serving someone else.  We get self-focused.  It’s important to get outside your box and to help others.  You don’t have to go to Guatemala to serve someone.  It could start in your office, your school, your neighborhood, or even your home.  Someone needs a helping hand or a kind word, and you have the opportunity to be the helping hand or kind word for this person.  What is one way you can serve someone else today?  How do you think serving others could stretch you?

This morning, I’ll be out running again.  When I finish my run, I’ll stretch again.  When this is over, I’ll be finding ways to keep stretching myself throughout the day.  How about you?

What is one thing you will do TODAY to stretch yourself?