Ice Breaker – Music In Your Head

Each week on The Stretched Blog, I ask an ice breaker question.  The questions are designed to help us get to know each other here in The Stretched Community.  I’ll provide my answer to the question here in the post, and then you can leave your response in the comments.  While you’re in the comments section, see how others answered the ice breaker question.

Last night, we enjoyed Hannah’s season ending track and field banquet.  (My wife says I’m writing too much about track and field.)  It was a great way to end the season as teammates laughed together and coaches celebrated the accomplishments of this year’s team.  One of the coaches said something about one of the senior runners that led me to this week’s ice breaker question.  I hope you’ll chime in with your answer.

Question:  What kind of music is in your head?

My Answer:  I listen to many types of music – hard rock, alternative rock, rap, ska, gospel, and sometimes classical.  I’m loving the Lumineers, All Sons & Daughters, Mumford & Sons, and Philip Philips.  But lately, I’ve enjoyed getting back to classic rock.  There’s something about classic rock that brings me back to my youth.  I enjoy listening to bands like Yes, Boston, Van Halen, and CCR.  Last weekend as I journeyed to and from the Poconos for my annual camping trip with some great friends from New Jersey, I found myself scanning through the FM tuner in search of another classic rock song.  Good times!

Answer this week’s ice breaker question by leaving a comment.  I look forward to reading your response!  (As always, feel free to share links.)

Connecting With Teenagers – Worth It!

Last night, I had the privilege of attending the “RIOT Graduation“, an evening in which the outgoing seniors of our church’s high school youth group were honored.  19 of the 37 seniors from the group were there with their friends and family to celebrate this milestone.

Part of the program for the evening included a time when each senior came up to the stage along with a friend, family member, or relational leader for a time of letter reading.  Each senior hand-picked someone in their lives to write a letter to them which was read up on the stage.  As one of the newer relational leaders of the team and as a father of a high school freshman, it was a great experience to watch as family, friends, and leaders expressed their thoughts and feelings about their senior.

I have to admit that there were a few moments when my eyes might have been watering just a little bit especially as parents expressed their admiration, love, and hope for their child.  That could be me someday.  It’s amazing how quickly it all goes.

I was especially impressed with relational leaders who were called to the stage to read a letter to one of the students.  It was obvious in these moments that relationships with teenage students can be life changing for both students and leaders.  We live in a world that is so busy and is so filled with distractions that one-on-one relationships often take a back seat to busy schedules and impersonal communication over social media or texting.  It was clear in these letters that leaders had taken time to connect with students beyond the casual hello at a youth group meeting.

I’m currently reading Connect: Real Relationships in a World of Isolation by Jonathan McKee.  In the book, McKee shares his thoughts on connecting with students on an individual basis.  He gives reasons why this is important.  And then he shares practical ideas to help leaders (paid and volunteers) make meaningful connections with teens.  In Connect, Jonathan shares:

Face-to-face conversations can be transformative.  It’s amazing how God uses one-on-one interaction to shape lives.

Yes.  It can be uncomfortable at times.  Yes.  Teenagers say the strangest things and ask the weirdest questions.  Yes.  Students will stretch you.

But it’s worth it.  As I was reminded at last night’s RIOT Graduation event, real one-on-one relationships between students and leaders can make a huge difference in the life of a teenager.  Last night, I saw 19 young adults ready to take the next step of their lives better prepared because of the time investment made by the adults in their lives.

I’m thankful for people like Ray and Joann Rivera, Dave and Nora Kennedy, and Ken and Kathy Shumate who took time to invest in me when I was a teenager.  And I look forward to paying that forward for the teenagers in my life.

When you were a teenager, who invested time into your life?  How are you investing in the current generation of teenagers?

Three Easy Stretches to Writing a Book (Dan Erickson)

Today’s guest post comes from Dan Erickson.  Dan and I have become friends over the past year thanks to the blog world.  While we live on opposite sides of the country, we have several things in common:  We are both PKs (Pastor’s Kids).  We both have daughters.  And we both like to write.  Dan has written two books.  I read the first book (and loved it), and I can’t wait to read his second book which just came out.  In today’s post, Dan shares some thoughts on writing a book.  Dan’s bio appears at the bottom of his post.

Three Easy Stretches to Writing a Book

Writing a book is a challenge.  I know.  I’ve written two.  So what does it take to write a book?  It’s simple.  It takes consistent commitment.

Here are my three suggestions for anyone who wants to write a book:

1.  Start writing immediately: People tend to have a thousand excuses why they can’t start writing a book.  Here’s a short list of ways not to get started:

• I don’t have a story.
• I don’t have time.
• I have writer’s block.
• I’m not a good enough writer.

These excuses are all lies.  We all have a story in us.  We all have 15 minutes a day to spare.  There’s really no such thing as writer’s block.  We become better writers every time we sit down and write.

It doesn’t matter what you write at first.  It could be a journal post, poetry, or a how-to manual.  Just sit down and start.

2.  Set a loose, long-term goal: I set loose goals for my book projects.  When I wrote my first book, A Train Called Forgiveness, I didn’t really have a goal.  I just started writing and discovered I could do it. 

I wrote the first draft in about three months, I found an editor at the college where I work, let the book sit for a few months, and did the rewrite.  The whole process took about nine months from start to finish.

The goal for the second book, At the Crossing of Justice and Mercy, was more specific.  I set a loose date of Spring 2013 and spent most of a year working through the process.

The third book of the series, The Track to Redemption, is going to stretch me the most.  I know this one is going to be the hardest to write.  It has the most difficult theme and I want it to be the best of the three.  So I’ve set a date of 2014/2015.  That gives me a little leeway and allows me to do some other writing and music projects in between.

Give yourself some flexibility and don’t let yourself burnout.

3.  Make writing a daily habit: Here’s my final tip.  Write every day.  You don’t have to work on your book every day, but write something: a poem, a blog post, a letter.  Just don’t let these other forms of writing become an excuse not to work on your book.

It’s okay to take a few weeks or even a few months off between book projects.  In fact, it likely helps with the creative process.  It gives you time to think, to stretch your imagination.  But you need to set a time to get back onto the project.  For instance, I have a start on my third book, but I’m taking a few months off to work on promotion.  But I have a cabin to stay at this summer where I’ll buckle down and write.

For me, the writing has come pretty easy.  The hard part, and what really stretches me is the promotion, the waiting for something to happen.

Trying to self-promote a self-published book is like trying to find the eye-of-a-needle in a hay mountain.

Promoting a book takes time and energy.  It gets frustrating and depressing when you see low sales and slow growth.  It makes you question whether it’s all worth the effort in the first place.  But you need to evaluate your reasons for writing a book in the first place.  For me, it’s all about the story.  My stories generate thought, healing, and hope.  If only a few people are touched by them, that’s reward in itself.

So go ahead.  Write a book.  But write it for the right reasons.

Question: Do you have a book in you?

Dan Erickson is a writer, poet, and songwriter in his spare time.  He teaches feature writing and public speaking courses at a college in the Northwest.  He’s a single dad to his daughter Annie.  He was the child victim of a cult, and his first book A Train Called Forgiveness, is a fictionalized version of that experience.  You can learn more about Dan’s work on his blog @ http://www.danerickson.net      

Track & Field – 3 Lessons From The Long Jump

My son, Isaac, ran track and field for the first time this year.  One of his events was the long jump.  It was interesting watching him compete in this event.  There is definitely a mix of athleticism, strength, speed, timing, and coordination that is required to be successful in the long jump.

In the long jump, runners start at the end of a running path that leads to a sand pit.  As the runners run towards the pit, they accelerate in an effort to get as much speed as possible.  Right before the sand pit, jumpers hit a take off board.  From the take off board, the jumper leaps as far as possible into the sand pit.

Watching the long jumpers at both the middle school and high school level, I think there’s something we can all learn from the long jump.  Here are 3 lessons from the long jump:

1. Momentum is key.  As an engineering student, I learned in physics class that momentum equals mass times velocity.  If a jumper does not move with any speed, he will not get very far if or when he reaches the take off board.  While there is importance in taking time to be still.  We are called to have an active faith.  The book of James says it well:   What does it profit, my brethren, if someone says he has faith but does not have works? Can faith save him? If a brother or sister is naked and destitute of daily food, and one of you says to them, “Depart in peace, be warmed and filled,” but you do not give them the things which are needed for the body, what does it profit? Thus also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead.  James 2:14-17
2. Precision is required.  A jumper practices over and over again, so he can learn where to start on the run way, how fast to run down the runway, and when to jump.  One of the keys to the long jump is jumping off the take off board as close to the sand pit without going over the take off board.  When a runner doesn’t practice, he will either go over the take over board which is referred to as a fault, or he will jump too early and fail to get the most out of his attempt.  As Christ followers, we must become a student of our faith.  It starts with God’s Word.  We must know God’s Word, so we can make the best “leap” possible.  I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you.  Psalm 119:11
3. Faith makes a difference.  When the jumper leaves the take off board, there is little else he can do except allow his body to fly towards the sand pit.  There are times in life where we must take a leap of faith.  We have to trust that things will work out even when we can’t see the outcome in full view.  Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.  Hebrews 11:1

What lessons could you add to the list above?  What leaps of faith have you faced in life?  What have you learned through taking a leap of faith?

Give Me A Break

Hello, Stretched Community!

I just wanted to let you know that I’m taking a few days off to enjoy the holiday weekend with friends and family.  I’ll be back on Tuesday.

In the meantime, how do you enjoy taking a break?  What do you do to recharge yourself?

See you next week!

Answers From Me Part 6 – Superhero

A couple of weeks ago, I asked The Stretch Community to ask me anything.  And they did!  I’ve answered five of the questions so far, and I thought I’d take a stab at another question today.  This one comes from Matt McWilliams.  Here’s his question:

If you could be any superhero, who would you be and why?

Also, can I borrow $1 Million?…and by “borrow” I mean “have.”

I would probably go with Superman.

When I was a kid, I thought it would be so amazing to be able to fly. I can remember running down the hallway of our house into the living room and jumping into the couch. I believed that for a brief second I was actually flying. Believe it or not, I’ve felt that feeling on the basketball court a few times (not recently). It’s a feeling that you are floating through the air. But it only lasts for a quick moment. It doesn’t last.

As a kid, I also played with the idea of being invisible. Perhaps, this superpower would be more amazing than flying. You could walk into a room without anyone noticing. I could sneak into the kitchen and get a bowl of ice cream, and I could eat it undetected – as long as nobody was in the kitchen when I came in to see the freezer open and close.

More recently, I’ve thought that it would be helpful if somehow I could be in multiple places at the same time. Especially as our kids are involved in different activities, I would love to be at work, be at home, and be at the track meet or other activity all at the same time. We often joke at the office that the cloning machine is broken.

But in reality, these superpowers remain out of reach. It’s probably a good idea that we can’t do all these things. My guess it that we would have a hard time using these powers selflessly. I’m also guessing that possession of these superpowers would cause us to stray from God. We would fail to realize the amazing power of our Creator.

But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us.  2 Corinthians 4:7

So maybe it’s a good thing that I’m not Superman.  As for your other question, Matt, I don’t have a million dollars, but I’d gladly buy you a cup of coffee when we get together.  Thanks for the question!

And that’s my answer!

Now, it’s your turn.  Answer Matt’s question:  If you could be any superhero, who would you be and why?

OKC Tornadoes – 5 Ways to Deal with Life Halting Experiences

This has been a traumatic week for many in the center of our country as they’ve been faced with the reality of tornadoes that literally ripped through their lives destroying homes, schools, businesses, cars, trees, and lives.  Honestly, it is difficult to fully imagine the pain, anguish, and loss that so many in Oklahoma must be feeling this week.

My parents are finishing up an assignment at a church in Midwest City, Oklahoma which is just north of Moore, Oklahoma is located.  I talked to my Dad the other night, and he described the destruction as devastating and like nothing else he had previously experienced.  It was obvious in our conversation that the tornadoes had brought life in their area to a screeching halt.

Imagine driving your car at 65 miles an hour and it suddenly stops completely.  Or imagine riding your bicycle at 15 miles an hour when someone jams a stick in your spokes.

This is how I imagine it must have felt for so many when the tornadoes came and interrupted their lives.

Sometimes life is like this.  We are coasting along when something happens in our lives that brings things to a screeching halt.  It’s happened in my life a few times – like the time I crashed my car two weeks before my wedding, like when my wife was rushed to the hospital shortly after our son was born, and like the moment I learned that my grandfather had passed away six years ago.

I certainly don’t have all the answers, but I’ve learned a few things through life halting events.  Here are 5 Ways to Deal with Life Halting Experiences:

1. Hang on.  Sometimes this is all we can do.  When we don’t understand, when we don’t know the plan, we can trust God and hang on to His hand.  I remember asking during these times, “Why?”  Even in the toughest moments, we must remember that He will never leave us.
   

   “No one will be able to stand against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you.”  Joshua 1:5

2. Trust God.  In times like this, I’ve gone back to Proverbs 3:5-6 as a promise that God will make my paths straight even when life doesn’t make sense.
   

   Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.  Proverbs 3:5-6

3. Lean into family and friends.  I can’t tell you how much family and friends have meant to our family when life’s train seems to have derailed.  It helps to know that someone is praying for me, is willing to talk or listen as I wrestle through the challenges of life, and is willing to be there when I can’t fully focus on my daily needs.  If you’re missing this in your own life, I’d encourage and challenge you to seek out this kind of friendship.  Our church small group experience has provided many of these types of friendships.
4. Consider a change.  Sometimes a life stopping experience can be the catalyst to positive change in our lives.  I have no idea what this means for victims of the tornadoes.  Maybe these experiences are a call to change direction.
   

   “See, I am doing a new thing!  Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?  I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.”  Isaiah 43:19

5. Learn and grow.  Life halting experiences can be life altering experiences if we take time to learn and grow.  This is why I recommend a journal or even a blog as a way to record life’s happenings.  I have learned so much through the major speed bumps of life and the blog and my journal have become great places to record and process these experiences.

For those directly impacted by this week’s events in Oklahoma recovery will be tough.  I can’t begin to imagine what these residents are going through.  To many, my thoughts will seem shallow.  It’s not my intent to belittle what those in Oklahoma have experienced.  I simply mean to point out a few things I’ve learned from life halting experiences of my own.  This I know, we can certainly pray for the victims and more importantly find ways to help out.

What have you learned from a life stopping experience?  What other tips do you have for handling these kinds of times?

The Impossible

Over the weekend, our family sat down together to watch a movie.  There are times when it seems like we are running so quickly from one event or activity to the next.  It was so nice just to be still together in our own home for a couple of hours.  Leanne and Isaac picked out the movie from one of our local Redbox kiosks.  It seems like I am more and more out of the loop on the whole movie scene, so it’s no surprise that I had never heard of the movie they picked out – The Impossible.

The movie portrays the true story of a family caught in the ravages of a large tsunami that hit southeast Asia in 2004.  They family who is vacationing along the coast is separated and swept away when the giant wave decimates the resort where they were staying.  (Spoiler alert!)  Most of the movie is spent telling the story of their search for one another and of their eventual reunion.

Most of the movie is pretty graphic as it shows the tsunami along with the injuries that occurred as a result.  When Leanne told me what the movie was about, I was honestly not sure I wanted to see it.  Who wants to watch destruction?

I’m glad I stuck around to the end.  The movie was pretty powerful.  In fact, there were a couple of moments that brought tears to my eyes.  Along with the tears, the movie brought a few thoughts to my head that have been rolling around for a few days.

• Our God would go to any lengths to connect with us.  In the movie, the father (played by Ewan McGregor) goes on a mission to find his oldest son and his wife.  He is determined to find them even if it meant leaving his two smaller children with strangers for a period of time.  As I thought about this aspect of the movie, I kept thinking about Jesus story of The Lost Sheep – the fact that he would leave the 99 sheep in order to find the one lost sheep.  Indeed, this is what our Father did when He sent His Son for us.  For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.  John 3:16
• We play a role in helping people connect to their Father.  In the movie, Lucas (the oldest son) starts collecting the names of separated family members from complete strangers in the hospital.  He then walks through the entire hospital trying to find people to go with the names.  At one point, he finds a boy who goes with a father he had met earlier.  Their reunion is beautiful amidst the chaos and calamity of the hospital.  As Christ followers, we have a mission to help others connect to their Father.  This is not a mission to be taken lightly.  It’s urgent.  This is why we need to make the most of every opportunity.  Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful. And pray for us, too, that God may open a door for our message, so that we may proclaim the mystery of Christ, for which I am in chains. Pray that I may proclaim it clearly, as I should. Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.  Colossians 4:2-6
• We’re called to help the least of these – the widows and the orphans.  In the movie, Lucas and his mother (played by Naomi Watts) are trying to get to higher ground when they hear the voice of a child screaming out for help.  They are in a tough situation themselves desperate for help when they make a decision to go help this little boy.  Jesus tells us in Matthew 25:31-46 that whenever we help the least of these, we are actually helping Him.  As I processed this part of the story, I kept going back to this verse in James:  Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.  James 1:27

The circumstances of life can sometimes seem impossible.  We face trials of many kinds, and we can easily get caught up in our tunnel-visioned, self-focused reality.  It’s important to remember that we have a Father who loves us through thick and thin.  And it’s important to live our lives in a way that honors Him.  Believe it or not, The Impossible reminded me of this.

What are you facing today that is IMPOSSIBLE?  How does it help to know that there is a God who relentlessly pursues you?

Rally Night TONIGHT!

Tonight is a special night for our family.  And if you live in the area (Eastern Pennsylvania), we hope you’ll join us.  (If you live outside the area or can’t make it tonight, you can still help out!)

From 5 PM until 7:30 PM, we’ll be holding a Rally Night at the Royersford Chick-Fil-A.  A percentage of all proceeds during this time will go towards our short-term missions trip to Guatemala this summer.  To date, we’ve raised $3,550 towards our trip.  The cost of our trip is right around $5,600.  You can find out more about how you can help with our trip by clicking here.

This summer, our family will be taking a journey to serve with GO! Ministries in the village of Santo Domingo Xenacoj in Guatemala.  During their trip, they will be working with widows and orphans in the village.  Specifically, we will be focusing on a feeding program, kid camp program, and direct service to widows.

 Hope to see you there.  And thanks for your support!

Ice Breaker – Vacation Plans

Each week on The Stretched Blog, I ask an ice breaker question.  The questions are designed to help us get to know each other here in The Stretched Community.  I’ll provide my answer to the question here in the post, and then you can leave your response in the comments.  While you’re in the comments section, see how others answered the ice breaker question.

For many, next weekend marks the beginning of summer.  People start traveling and taking time off from work to enjoy a break and to spend time with family and friends.  This week’s question will get you thinking about the summer ahead and will remind you of summer days of the past.

Question:  What are your vacation plans for this summer?  What’s one of the best vacations that you have ever experienced?

My Answer:  If you have been reading along for a little while, you’ll know our family is planning to go to Guatemala later this summer on a short-term missions trip to the village of Xenacoj.  Besides that, we are planning to take a swing through the Midwest (Illinois, Wisconsin, and Minnesota) to visit my family who live in that area.  In between visits with family, we’re also hoping to hit one of the water parks in the Wisconsin Dells.

As for best vacations experienced, I would say that I really enjoyed the trip that Leanne and I took to France to celebrate our tenth anniversary.  We stayed in Paris for two days, the Louvre Valley for two days, the Bordeaux region for two days, near Marseilles for two days, and Lyon for two days.  It was wonderful to see the various sites of this beautiful country, and it was refreshing to spend uninterrupted time together with my bride.

Answer this week’s ice breaker question by leaving a comment.  I look forward to reading your response!  (As always, feel free to share links.)