Walking The Tightropes of Life – Balancing Truth and Grace

Last week, my foundations class talked about groups.  The main focus of the discussion was how a solid group setting can be a great place to experience both truth and grace.  Many of us lean one way or the other.  We’re either grace-givers or truth-tellers.  I’m sure I lean more towards the “grace-giver” side.

The reality is that we need both grace and truth in our lives in order to grow and stay balanced.  My friend, Diane Karchner, helped explain this to me one time.  If we have a relationship that doesn’t have truth or grace, the relationship is one that is non-involved.  It’s a relationship where nobody cares.  If we have a relationship that has truth without grace, it’s a graceless relationship.  There is no margin for mistake or error in a relationship like this.  If we have a relationship that has grace without truth, it’s a truthless relationship.  These relationships are solely based on what I want to hear and not what I may need to hear.  Finally, we hit our sweet spot when grace and truth are both existent in a relationship.  This is where true agape love happens.

There are many times where I regret that I haven’t kept this balanced.  I have friends and even family who have needed both, and I have typically failed to bring truth to the table.  I don’t like confrontation.  It’s a lousy excuse, but it’s true.  I sometimes fail to speak up, because I don’t want to rock the boat and I certainly don’t want to be rejected.

It can also be easy to runaway from relationships where I know I’m going to get a little bit of both – truth and grace.  It doesn’t always feel good if the relationship is more based on truth than grace.  I guess that’s why a balance is important.  We need people in our lives who love us enough to tell us the truth and who love us enough to give us grace and a second chance when we screw up.  That’s where I want to be!

Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ.  Ephesians 4:15

Where /when/how have you experienced truth and grace?  How would a little more truth have been beneficial to something you experienced in the past?  How would a little more grace have been beneficial to something you experienced in the past?

Powerless

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.  2 Corinthians 12:9

We’re still without power at our house.  It’s an interesting feeling being powerless.  The house is getting colder, and it is so quiet with out the noise of the lights, computers, and other electric-powered things in the house.  We’ve been told by PECO that we may not have power for a week.  It’s kind of a powerless feeling.  I certainly don’t have the tools or the skills to fix the power on our street, and I can’t control the schedules of the electric repair teams.

Honestly, we’re blessed.  We’ve had so many friends reaching out to us with offers of refrigerator space, meals, generators, and warm places to sleep and hang out.  Others in our area have not been so fortunate.  In a town near us, a family lost their entire house in a fire Monday night during the hurricane.  I can’t imagine the feeling of loss and despair.

For some reason, this song by All Sons & Daughters keeps coming to my mind – All the Poor and Powerless.  “All will sing out, Hallelujah…”

I don’t know how you made out in the storm, but I pray that you and I will remember to praise God through the storms of life.

How were you impacted by Hurricane Sandy?  When was the last time a storm left you feeling powerless?

All the poor and powerless
And all the lost and lonely
All the thieves will come confess
And know that You are holy
And know that You are holy

And all will sing out
Hallelujah
And we will cry out
Hallelujah
All the hearts who are content
And all who feel unworthy
And all who hurt with nothing left
Will know that You are holy

And all will sing out
Hallelujah
And we will cry out
Hallelujah

Shout it
Go on scream it from the mountains
Go on and tell it to the masses
That He is God
We will sing out
Hallelujah
And we will cry out
Hallelujah

Store Up…Collecting Things That Matter

This week, our church is intersecting with our community through a week-long Servefest.  Our family is helping out with Project HEARTH.  You can read some of my thoughts in yesterday’s post.  Tons of progress was made last night!  I’m excited to see what we’ll be able to accomplish by working together this week.

If you couldn’t figure it out, the woman we are helping is a hoarder.  I haven’t seen the TV show, Hoarders, but I’m quite confident that this home would easily fit in with the show.  I did some research yesterday to learn more about hoarding.  According to Wikipedia,

Compulsive hoarding (or pathological collecting) is a pattern of behavior that is characterized by the excessive acquisition of and inability or unwillingness to discard large quantities of objects that would seemingly qualify as useless or without value. Compulsive hoarding behavior has been associated with health risks, impaired functioning, economic burden, and adverse effects on friends and family members. When clinically significant enough to impair functioning, hoarding can prevent typical uses of space so as to limit activities such as cooking, cleaning, moving through the house, and sleeping. It can also be dangerous if it puts the individual or others at risk for fire, falling, poor sanitation, and other health concerns.

For more information on compulsive hoarding, click here.  The woman we are helping fits the description very closely.

It’s been a challenge to get this woman and her home out of my head.  I keep wondering how someone could let it get to this level.  I keep asking why there aren’t people in her life to help.

One thing this woman collects is yarn.  She has enough yarn to make sweaters for all the students at our local elementary school.  As we were talking with her last night, you could tell she had a “relationship” with her yarn.  I realize this is part of her behavior (perhaps illness), but it got me thinking (of course).

What am I holding onto in this life?  What do I collect?  My wife often gives me a hard time about all the books that I get through the mail.  I still have all my baseball cards (roughly 30,000 of them).  I have several years worth of Runner’s World and Handyman Magazine.

I’m not a hoarder, but it’s easy to go after the wrong thing – to hold onto things that won’t last.  In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus talks about collecting things that matter.

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”  Matthew 6:19-21

Over the past couple of days, we have literally seen the destruction of stuff by moths, worms, and other “vermin.”  I don’t want to get to the end of my life only to hear “Jon had the biggest and best baseball card collection” or “I loved Jon’s collection of books.”  I want to collect things that matter.  The only thing I can take from here that really matters is people.  What am I doing on a daily basis to store up treasures in heaven?  This is a question worth pursuing!

What do you collect?  What are you hoarding?

[NOTE:  If you live in the area and could lend a hand, we need people who can work inside and outside her home – cleaning, painting, doing repairs, and doing yard work.  If we could find roofing material, gutters, and carpenters, we would put a new roof on her house.  If we could get chainsaws, brush hogs, and lawn mowers, we would overhaul her yard.  We could also use dumpsters.  If anyone know how and where we could get free dumpsters, let me know.  We are scratching the surface this week, but hopefully we will leave a dent that lasts for an eternity.]

How Crazy Are Your Dreams?

How crazy are your dreams?

Over the weekend, Felix Baumgartner skydived from over 128,000 feet above the earth.  I don’t know the full story, but the video above captures the highlights.  This daredevil obviously had a crazy dream.  Who would every dream of jumping out of a weather balloon at the edge of the atmosphere with nothing more than a parachute and a space suit?

Our dreams don’t have to be that crazy, but how big are our dreams?

We were talking about this the other night at dinner as we discussed the parable of the talents.  Did you ever stop to realize that God has given us gifts to use and dreams to pursue?  Sometimes I think that we dream way too small.  As we were talking about it at our dinner table, we asked the question – what dreams has God-given us?

I commented that I have a dream to write a book someday.  My wife quickly responded that this dream seems rather small as that dream isn’t all that far off considering the amount of writing I do these days.  She challenged me to think bigger – to dream a crazier dream.

Okay, here goes.  I want to write a library of books – at least 10.  I want to build a village – not just one house in Guatemala.  I dream of being 100% debt free – including the mortgage.  I dream of making over two million dollars and giving most of it away.  I dream of leaving a legacy that goes way beyond my life time.  I dream of standing on top of Mt. Everest – of visiting Sweden – of showing people God’s love by the way I live everyday.

So often, I limit my dreams.  I become content with having three meals a day, living a comfortable life, and going through the motions and routines of everyday living.  I think life can be so much more than this.

I don’t think I’ll every jump out of a weather balloon over 20 miles from the earth’s surface, but I want to do things in my life that matter – that go beyond my hopes and wildest dreams – that leave a dent in this world.

God has not given us a spirit of fear. But he has given us a spirit of power and love and self-control.  2 Timothy 1:7

How about you?  How crazy are your dreams?

What are you doing to pursue your dreams?

Walking The Tightropes of Life – Balancing Things Like Humility and Pride

There are times in life when it seems like we are walking on a tightrope.  Tightrope walkers typically hold a long pole in the middle that they use to stay balanced.  If they start leaning one way, they move their arms and the pole until they regain their balance.

Imagine for a second that you are a tightrope walker.  As you walk across the rope, someone grabs on to one of the ends of the pole you are carrying.  Obviously, this will mess you up.  You will quickly need to find someone of similar size and weight to grab onto the other end of the pole.  (Or you would need to drop the pole – I suppose).

Throughout life, we are faced with similar decisions.  If we don’t make the right decision, our life will get out of balance.  For example, as parents if we love our kids yet we never tell them the truth, we are doing our children a disservice.  Many parents are in this boat today as they seek to become their kids best friends.  On the other hand, if we only have truth in our relationships with our kids yet never show them love, we are missing out on a huge opportunity to build up our children.  Kids who have been parented this way probably feel like they are being yelled at all the time.  There needs to be a balance of truth and love.

Can you think of other things in life that require this type of balance?

Another good example is work and life.  I need to work, so I can live.  If I work too much, I miss out on life.  If I party too much (living large so to speak), I will quickly run out of resources for living.

As I was traveling yesterday, I started thinking about how this applies to serving.  With the advent of social media and blogging, it is easy to get thoughts and ideas out there.  It’s also easy to share with everyone about the details of life.  I’ve done this recently with my trip to Guatemala.  It’s been healthy for me to reflect out loud about this trip and it’s impact on my life.  I hope that it has been expressed with a certain level of humility, but I realize that there is also a danger in sharing about this kind of experience.  We can easily make it all about me.  Look at me!  Look what I’ve done!  I’m the man!

In Jesus’ famous Sermon on the Mount, he shares some advice for those who help the needy:

“Be careful not to practice your righteousness in front of others to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven.

“So when you give to the needy, do not announce it with trumpets, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and on the streets, to be honored by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.”  Matthew 6:1-4

It seems to me that there has to be some balance here.  The Bible also talks about the importance of spurring one another on toward love and good deeds:

And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds… Hebrews 10:24

I hope that my posts about Guatemala and past posts about our H.O.P.E. activities have been taken this way.  For one of my primary goals with this whole blog is to STRETCH others while I’m being STRETCHED.  But if I’m honest, there is probably a small amount of motivation in sharing these types of things that is meant to bring me some glory.  I’m just being honest.

The Apostle Paul gives us some great advice when it comes to balancing this whole thing:

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.  In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness.  And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death—even death on a cross!

Pint Size Dreams Or Ocean Size Dreams

Over the course of this year, God has definitely been working on my understanding of faith.  Back in the spring, I posted about taking a leap of faith.  That message is still working on me.  This weekend, we had the honor and pleasure of hosting Dave Sgro and his son, Luke, at our house on Saturday night and to our church on Sunday morning.  Dave and his family are missionaries in the town of Xenacoj in Guatemala.  Our team worked with his organization (Guatemala Outreach (Go!) Ministries) while we were in Guatemala this summer.

Dave and Luke arrived at our house late around 10PM on Saturday night.  I’m sure he was tired from driving and we were tired from a busy day, but we stayed up for a couple of hours to hear more about Dave’s ministry.  It’s exciting to hear how God is providing ideas and resources for things that are having a huge impact on the town of Xenacoj.  Dave also shared his families’ story about their decision to sell everything they owned in North Carolina including their home and business and to move their entire family to Guatemala two years ago.

As we talked, Dave talked about our expectations for God.  He says that we often limit God through our expectations and dreams.  We expect God to fill our pint size hopes and dreams when God is actually capable of filling ocean size hopes and dreams.  It was a reminder that we need to dream big.  I wrote about this earlier when I talked about building a house in Guatemala.  This gave me a taste of this.  I could have just sought out enough money to go on the trip, but I decided to see if we could build a house through The Stretched Community.  I wonder even in that thought if I my expectations were too limited.

What would happen if we really dreamed bigger – if we realized that God is able to do far more than we could ever imagine?

Here are some of the ideas that come to mind for me:

• A family missions trip this summer to Xenacoj with other families.  No, a lifetime of Kingdom Journeys that change families both here in America and around the world.
• Another house built by and through the Stretched Community.  No, a real Stretched Community built by and through The Stretched Blog and The Stretched Community.
• A book.  No, ten books!

It’s my prayer that you and I would wake up to the vast love and power of a God who is able to do far more that we could imagine.  Paul’s prayer in Ephesians 3 makes more sense to me now than ever:

For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.

(Ephesians 3:14-21)

Seriously, how are you putting limits on your dreams?  How can you enlarge your dreams?  What is one area where you need to grasp how wide and long and high and deep God’s love is for you?  What’s your dream – is it pint-sized or ocean-sized?

More Than Words

It seems like God is hitting me over the head with a message recently.  Following Christ and sharing His love is so much more than words – knowing words, memorizing words, and studying words.

While I think it’s important to read, study, and understand the Bible, I think it’s so much more important to put these teachings into action – into following Christ with our hands and feet.  This message has been hammered home in a few different but obvious mediums.

First, I was catching up on my blog reading on Saturday morning when I came across this video in a blog post by Ryan Tate at Discipulus.  In the video, Francis Chan shares some simple but obvious thoughts about discipleship – what it is and what it is not.

Next, I was finishing up Love Does by Bob Goff on Sunday morning (I shared about this book on my blog yesterday).  Towards the end of the book, Bob offers his thoughts on Bible study:

What’s up with equating “Bible study” with knowing God anyway?  Wouldn’t it be a horrible thing if we studies the ones we loved instead of bonding in deeper ways by doing things with them?  I’d never want to get married to a girl no matter how much I studied her.  I’d rather take her sailing or fishing or eat cotton candy with her on a Ferris wheel.  I don’t think knowing what her name means in Greek is going to help me love her more.  In fact, they have a name for guys who just study things about a person they like but don’t do anything about it – they’re called bachelors.

So I started getting together with the same guys each week and instead of calling it a Bible study, we call it a “Bible doing.”  We’ve been at it for fifteen years now, and I’ve found there’s a big difference between the two.  At our Bible doing, we read what God has to say and then focus all of our attention on what we are going to do about it.  Just agreeing isn’t enough.  I can’t think of a single time where Jesus asked His friends to just agree with Him.

Finally, I was in church on Sunday morning when our guest pastor, Paul Williams, asked the question in his sermon – “What if we loved our neighbor as ourselves?”  In Paul’s sermon, he used the story of the Good Samaritan (Luke 10:25-37) to point out that anyone and everyone is our neighbor.  Then he used the story of the Rich Young Man (Matthew 19:16-30) to remind us that we’re to love our neighbors as we love ourselves, and part of this is learning to love ourselves.  Finally, Paul turned to Matthew 22:15-40.  In this passage, the Pharisees and Sadducees are having a conversation with Jesus.  (These men were known to have the Bible (The Old Testament) memorized knowing every single law that was supposed to be followed.  At the end of this passage, Jesus answers questions thrown out with a famous passage, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’  This is the first and greatest commandment.  And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’  All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”  It’s that simple.  It doesn’t matter how much we know about the Bible if we’re not loving God and loving others with all we’ve got.

Bam!  Bam!  Bam!

Three times nailed over the head in a matter of 24 hours.  Do you think God was trying to tell me something?

The truth is I grew up in a pastor’s family.  I was known as the Bible geek in my freshman English class for knowing all the answers to the Bible questions.  I’ve even prided myself on the knowledge I’ve gained and retained along the way.  Knowledge is okay (and is important for maintaining a sound doctrine and for reminding us of Biblical truths and standards), but action is even more important.  James states it well:

Faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.  James 2:17

I get so tired of all the political back and forth at this time of the year.  One side is trying to find the candidate who is the most Christian.  The other side is trying to find a government who will fix everything and create programs for our neighbors.  Wouldn’t it be a different world if Christians actually stepped up and loved their neighbors with action and not just words.  I think this is a challenge for all of us – including me.  And that’s how I’m being stretched right now!  I want my faith to be more than words.

How about you?  How are you loving your neighbor?  Is your faith and love for others based on words or based on action?

Always Be Prepared – Lessons From A Smoke Alarm (Part 2)

Yesterday, I explained how a smoke detector alarm in my home reminded me of some valuable truths related to my preparation for sharing the reason for my hope (I Peter 3:15,16).  Today’s post is a follow up to my story as well as an addition to my preparation list.

After getting up at 3:45AM to the sound of the first alarm, going to the grocery store at 4AM to purchase 9 volt batteries, and replacing the batteries in all the smoke detectors in our house, the smoke alarm was still going off periodically.  Needless to say, I was beside myself.  What else could I do to resolve this annoying and disruptive noise that was filling our house at random times.

I did some research, and I discovered that it’s recommended that the smoke detectors are cleaned with compressed air or a vacuum.  Apparently, dust can get into the detector over time and cause false alarms.  Leanne and Isaac attempted to vacuum out the detector in question once everyone was awake, but the alarm still continued.  Ugh!

Finally, reading further in the instructions, it says that the detector may need to be replaced.  So at lunch yesterday, I ran over to the local hardware store and picked up a copy of smoke detectors that were compatible with our system.  When I arrived home after work, Isaac and I replaced the detector.  And I’m happy to report that we haven’t had an alarm since!

And so I’ve learned a couple more things about being prepared to give an answer for my hope:

• Research.  Besides reading the Bible (which should be the starting point and foundation for sharing your faith), there are other resources out there that might be helpful.  A couple that come to mind are Out of the Saltshaker and into the Earth (Evangelism as a Way of Life) by Rebecca Pippert, The Master Plan of Evangelism by Robert E. Coleman, and Becoming a Contagious Christian by Bill Hybels.  Research also includes understanding the interests, beliefs, and perspectives of others.  There are plenty of books, blogs, and websites that can help with this task.
• Replace defective parts.  As you grow and learn, replace the things in your life that don’t work in representing Christ well.  When we become Christians, we become new creations.  The old is gone.  Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come^: The old has gone, the new is here! 2 Corinthians 5:17

What other tips to you have for being prepared to share our hope?  What have you had to research lately?  What resources do you recommend to help others prepare to share their faith?  What is something you’ve had to replace in your life recently?

Breaking the Cycle – Sometimes It’s Healthy to Get Out of Your Routine

I know that this post goes against my nature and against things I may have posted in the past. I still stand by my comfort level in having a dependable routine, and I still believe that routines are important for establishing healthy patterns that need to be repeated. Routines can also help to put an end to bad habits.

But sometimes the reverse is true. Sometimes it’s healthy to get out of your routine.

My recent trip to Guatemala was certainly a change from my typical schedule and way of doing things. This was good in opening my eyes, ears, and heart to the new things that God had to show me.

This week my routine is once again compromised while our kids are away at “Camp Grammy and Pappap”. This has meant taking the dogs out and taking them for walks instead of heading out for my morning run. It’s meant taking the trash down to the street and other chores that the kids have picked up over the past few years. But it’s also been a welcome change in the evenings as it has provided for one-on-one time with my wife. We’ve gone on a picnic, played tennis, and enjoyed dinner together.  In this case, the change in routine has been great for our marriage, and I think it will ultimately benefit our parenting when our kids return later this week.

I hate change, but sometimes it is so worth it!  Here are a few suggestions for playing with your routine this week:

1. Drive a different way to or from work this week.  If you’re like me, you could drive to work with your eyes closed (if it weren’t for the other cars and the traffic lights).  Taking a different path could show you something new and different.
2. Eat something new.  I don’t like tomatoes despite the fact that we grow them in our garden.  Last night, I actually tried a couple of pieces of tomato that my wife had prepared with fresh basil and mozzarella cheese.  It wasn’t my favorite, but it also wasn’t as bad as I expected.
3. Spend time with God in a new location.  For those of us who have regular “quiet times” with God, we often go to the same location and have the same routine.  This isn’t necessarily bad, but sometimes it can be refreshing to get with God somewhere new and to try a new routine.  Perhaps this means going to a park and sitting by a lake or stream.  Maybe it means exploring a new section of the Bible or praying in a different way.  Whatever you decide to do, consider taking your journal along with you.  Write down your thoughts on how God spoke to you through this change in routine.

Change isn’t always bad.  Sometimes it can be a good thing to break the cycle of our routine.

Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail.  They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.  Lamentations 3:22-23

What other suggestions to you have for getting out of your routine?  How have you broken the cycle of your own routines?  Was that a good experience or not?  Why?

Guest Post: Living the Lessons by Eileen Knowles

One of the most beautiful and scary things about writing is the power it has to transform us.

I’m learning over and over that when we choose to share our stories, the main goal isn’t to see how many pairs eyes view what we’ve written, the main goal is for us (the writer) to learn and grow in the process.

Our stats mean nothing to God…our souls mean everything.

It never fails, I’ll write about something that is on my heart and it becomes the learning portal for the day. The books and blogs I read, the conversations I hear, the sights I see, and the people I encounter seem to offer one more important piece in the learning puzzle. Every experience sheds more light on the lessons I am intended to learn.

Writing, if I allow it to, will:

convict me
challenge me
correct me

As I was writing this post, I realized that this not only goes for writing down our stories but for living out our stories as well.  When we choose to share our stories and our lives with others, when we choose to live fully engaged, when we choose to live with our eyes wide open…we are shaped and changed in the process. Our lives become the books we write and the legacy we leave.

Life, like writing, is one big lesson for us to learn. Each day is a new day to understand that lesson just little bit more.

Here are some areas where the Lord is currently stretching me:

It’s fine and dandy to write and read about grace…
but are you living it out in your life? Is grace the air you breathe? Do you inhale grace in order to exhale it on the lives around you?

It’s fine and dandy to write and read about loving and serving others…
but are you putting others first in your life? Do you treat loving others as the most important thing in your life or is it sometimes an interruption or an inconvenience?

It’s fine and dandy to write and read about the power of prayer…
but are you praying without ceasing? Is prayer your first resort or your last resort? Does your prayer life really reflect that you believe in the power of prayer?

What about you?  How is God currently stretching you as you try to live out your stories?

About the Author

Eileen Knowles is a small town Arizona girl who studied English at The University of Arizona a long, long time ago. She now lives in small town North Carolina with her husband, Roger, their eight-year old son, and one quirky dog named Bisbee. When she is not working part-time loving on animals at the local animal hospital, she thoroughly enjoys drinking coffee, running, playing Scrabble, leading Women’s Bible Study at her church, and writing about how cool it is to journey through life with Jesus holding her hand.

Eileen is passionate about leaving a legacy for her son and encouraging others along the way who might need a dose of hope poured into their weary lives.

You can find her taking The Scenic Route at www.eileenknowles.com

Twitter: https://twitter.com/cupojoegirl
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/eileen.knowles.9