Less Like Scars
“It’s been a hard year, but I’m climbing out of the rubble.
These lessons are hard, healing changes are subtle.”
– Sara Groves
Recently, I’ve had several people ask how things are going…how’s Leanne? Almost a year ago, Leanne was hospitalized. We’ve spent the past year recovering and rediscovering new normals, new priorities, and renewed appreciation and passion for each other, for friends and family, and for life. God is good!
As I look back on my journal and my blog from the past year I see pain, loneliness, and despair, but I also see healing, connection, and hope. Sara Groves song, Less Like Scars, speaks so clearly to my thoughts as I look back on this past year.
It’s been a hard year
But I’m climbing out of the rubble
These lessons are hard
Healing changes are subtle
But every day it’s
Less like tearing, more like building
Less like captive, more like willing
Less like breakdown, more like surrender
Less like haunting, more like remember
And I feel you here
And you’re picking up the pieces
Forever faithful
It seemed out of my hands, a bad situation
But you are able
And in your hands the pain and hurt
Look less like scars and more like
Character
Less like a prison, more like my room
It’s less like a casket, more like a womb
Less like dying, more like transcending
Less like fear, less like an ending
And I feel you here
And you’re picking up the pieces
Forever faithful
It seemed out of my hands, a bad situation
But you are able
And in your hands the pain and hurt
Look less like scars
Just a little while ago
I couldn’t feel the power or the hope
I couldn’t cope, I couldn’t feel a thing
Just a little while back
I was desperate, broken, laid out, hoping
You would come
And I need you
And I want you here
And I feel you
And I know you’re here
And you’re picking up the pieces
Forever faithful
It seemed out of my hands, a bad, bad situation
But you are able
And in your hands the pain and hurt
Look less like scars
And more like
Character
Today, I rejoice. I praise God for significant milestones achieved in the healing process. I’m thankful for a new compassion for families faced with the challenges of mental illness and other health problems. And I smile as I realize the promise of a bright future with hope for tomorrow. God is good!
(And by the way, Leanne is doing well – and so am I. Thanks for asking.)
How are you? How have you seen your scars transformed?
Heart Broken – Guest Post at Big B
Today, I have the privilege of presenting my first guest blog post over at Big B. Big B is the blog for an incredible young man named Brandon who is passionate about music, leadership, and God. I’ve connected with him on-line over the past couple of months, and I have been inspired by words. Please check out my post and please support Brandon by adding his blog to your regular reading.
Here’s an excerpt from my post:
It can be easy to fall into the trap of tunnel vision. We can all become so caught up in ourselves that we miss out on what’s happening to those around us. In many cases, we don’t even see those we walk by on the street or sit next to on the train. We live and operate in a world of me, me, me.
A recent family vacation to Canada took my family into Montreal for a day. There’s nothing like a vacation and a trip into a city to jolt one out of their routine and snap one to attention to things that matter. We had a wonderful time touring around Montreal. We saw many of the famous tourist sites including the market at Jean-Talon, the view of the city from the top of Mont Royal, Old Montreal, and the port. All these places were new and interesting, but I will always remember a brief encounter with a young man in a park near the home of the Montreal Canadians. Here’s how I remembered the encounter in my journal…
(If you’re interested in becoming a guest blogger on my blog, please leave me a comment. I’d love to connect with you. Also, I would certainly welcome other opportunities to be a guest blogger on your blog, so you can leave me a comment on that as well.)
Weeding Reminder
Last night, I did some weeding in the yard and in the garden while my son cut the grass. It’s amazing how the weeds can spring up so quickly and so large when you don’t stay on top of them. As I was weeding, I was reminded of my blog post from last year. My weed problem this year is not as bad as last year, but I think my thoughts still apply.
Lessons From My Front Lawn – September 6, 2010
The past three or four years, I’ve paid a company to treat our lawn to prevent the weeds, to prevent fleas and ticks, and to help it stay green and healthy. There’s no question that it paid off. Up until the spring, my grass was coming in great and green.
That all changed this summer when we decided not to use the company to treat our lawn and we were faced with one of the hotter and drier summers that we’ve had in a while. As the summer wore on, our front lawn went from a plush green carpet to a spotty brown and green, weed infested disaster thanks to the lack of treatment and the stresses of the summer heat. Honestly, I want to throw up every time I pull up our driveway. It just makes me sick to see what our lawn has become in just one summer.
Now, I realize that a green front lawn isn’t the answer to true happiness and contentment, but I think it speaks to something that is true for our own lives. Just like water and fertilizer help to keep our lawns healthy, keeping our spiritual lawn green and healthy requires water, nutrition, and weed prevention. We need to study God’s word (the Bible), and we need to spend time with God. We also need to live life in community – the kind of community that can be found by attending and getting involved at a local church along with the kind of community that can be found by getting involved in a small group. These spiritual treatments are essential to keeping our spiritual lives healthy.
Getting back to my lawn, we finally called the lawn company that we used before, and they explained that our grass can be restored. The weeds can be eradicated, and the effects of summer stress can be overcome. It will take some time and special attention, but there is hope for my front lawn.
So, this brings me to my question. How is your spiritual front lawn? Is it healthy or does it need some work? If your spiritual lawn is brown and weed infested, there is hope for restoration and renewal.
The Gift of Camping
This past weekend, we celebrated the 1oth anniversary of a great family camping tradition. We’ve been camping with the same four families since the beginning. It’s been amazing to watch our kids grow up together. Isaac was two and potty training on our first rainy camping trip to Locust Lake State Park. Now, Isaac’s eleven, and he’s becoming a wonderful young man. The story is similar for all the other kids as well. It’s truly been a gift to experience the richness of these friendships year after year. I look forward to many, many more family camping trips to come.
Nine out of the ten years, we have camped in a Pennsylvania State Park. Pennsylvania is the only state that has an established chaplaincy program in its state parks. Most years, we have worshiped together at the camp’s Sunday worship service. This year was no different as we walked down to the outdoor amphitheater following a delicious camp breakfast. I love my church, but there is something refreshing about getting outdoors and stripping away the music and lights and air conditioning.
At the service, Chaplain Jason shared from the passage in Romans. Jason’s message provided some great reminders:
1 Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. 2 Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.
3 For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you. 4 For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, 5 so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. 6 We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your faith; 7 if it is serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach; 8 if it is to encourage, then give encouragement; if it is giving, then give generously; if it is to lead, do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully.
Romans 12:1-8
1. I have gifts. I should be sharing these gifts.
2. My gifts are different from other people’s gifts. We all have different gifts.
3. Everyone’s gifts are important to completing the work of the body.
4. I’m not gifted in everything. Saying no sometimes is okay.
I’m sure there were some other great points, but these are the ones that struck me.
What fun family traditions do you have?
How are you using the gifts that God has given you?
Psalm 36 – Love and Faithfulness
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This morning I woke up with these words on my mind from Psalm 36:
5 Your love, LORD, reaches to the heavens,
your faithfulness to the skies.
6 Your righteousness is like the highest mountains,
your justice like the great deep.
You, LORD, preserve both people and animals.
7 How priceless is your unfailing love, O God!
People take refuge in the shadow of your wings.
8 They feast on the abundance of your house;
you give them drink from your river of delights.
9 For with you is the fountain of life;
in your light we see light.
Our vacation to Canada gave us some great visual reminders of God’s love and faithfulness.
How have you experienced God’s unfailing love and faithfulness this summer?
Vacation Church – My Sunday Quebec Experience
As you may have known or guessed, our family was on vacation last week. We took off for a week to enjoy the great outdoors and the French Canadian culture in Quebec, Canada. We spent most of our time in and around the small ski town of Mont-Tremblant. It was gorgeous and a wonderful break from the hustle and bustle of everyday life here in the Stolpe home. The Sunday we were there, we visited the only church in town, L’Eglise Sacre-Coeur (Sacred Heart Church). The church is a small Roman Catholic church that overlooks Lac Mercier. Here are some of my thoughts from our visit:
It was very interesting to be in a French-speaking church and to be in a catholic church. In some regards, it makes me appreciate my own church all that much more.
On the other hand, it was encouraging to see the devotion of those who regularly worship in this setting. A few other observations:
1. Besides the passing of the peace, we were not greeted by a single person. Nobody said, “Bon jour.” Nobody said, “Hello.” Nobody said anything. If you belong to a church, you should be friendly. Stop and say hello to those you don’t recognize.
2. We need to speak the language of those around us who don’t have a church home. Putting aside the French language and the differences in doctrine, would I or anyone else understand what was going on as part of this service? Do we expect people to come into our churches and fall in line with the routines and traditions we keep? Do we provide an explanation of our traditions, etc.? Are we relevant to the community around us?
3. The priest reminded me of (my wife’s) Uncle Dave’s brother, Tom. I know this is trivial, but it’s just what I noticed.
4. The French language is beautiful. I have no idea what everyone was saying or singing, but it sounded nice.
5. People think that church ends after communion. I shouldn’t judge as I don’t know what these people had to do this day, but I observed many people slipping out of the church as soon as communion was over. They didn’t stay around for the closing words. They didn’t stay around for fellowship. They left as quickly as they arrived. Our involvement with church isn’t meant to be a task that must be checked off the list. It’s meant to be our life. We’re called to be in Christian community that transcends the Sunday service. We’re called to be involved throughout the week, and we’re called to bring it into our communities. This doesn’t happen in a 40 minute Sunday service. This happens every minute of every day.
6. I’m not real great at the kneeling thing. Perhaps, I need to practice this more. Getting on my knees before God is a discipline of trusting God and of putting Him first.
I realize these thoughts are somewhat random, but I thought you’d enjoy hearing how I was stretched on vacation.
Where do you go to church when you’re on vacation? What have you learned from your vacation church experiences?
Am I Expecting Great Things?
From time to time, I like to revisit old blog posts. I think they can provide refreshment and renewed perspective on things. Here’s one I wrote over a year ago. Let me know what you think.
This morning, I woke up to make pancakes for our family before we headed off to church at Christ’s Church of the Valley. As I moved closer to finishing up the pancakes, I for some reason decided to grab a CD from my past and let it play as everyone else was waking up and enjoying breakfast. The CD I chose was Speechless by a favorite from my past Steven Curtis Chapman. For some reason, I was moved by track 4 – Great Expectations.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qLKrxg1QDng]In this song, Chapman sings about believing the unbelievable and receiving the inconceivable – about having Great Expectations. It hit me that I often don’t expect great things when I go to church or when I have my quiet time. Why? Perhaps, I’m too comfortable with the structure, pattern, and repetition of these “times with God.” Maybe, I’m lazy in my approach to God. Or maybe the wounds of the past have tainted my level of anticipation for God to work.
Whatever the case, I was challenged this morning. I was challenged to approach my time with God (privately and corporately) with a renewed expectation that God has something great in store – for my church, for my family, for my neighbors, for my job, and for me. I believe this in my head, but I want to believe it in my heart and live it out.
Matthew 7:7-11 reminds us that God has so much in store for each of us. This is a reason to be excited about living, about working, and about spending time with God.
“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened. Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!”
Thankful for a new day! Thankful for renewal! Thankful for the promise of great things! Thankful for an incredible, awesome, unbelievable, inconceivable God!
Do you have great expectations?
Getting Back To The Basics – Cape Cod Baseball League
I’ve mentioned before that I’m a big baseball fan. I have followed the game for most of my life – first as a Chicago Cubs fan – and now as a Philadelphia Phillies fan (since 1980 when I moved to the Philly area). It’s been fun to support the Phillies especially over the past five years as they have been very competitive, but…
Professional baseball isn’t what it used to be. With steroids, free agency, lack of player/team loyalty, higher ticket prices, and a crazy pay structure, players and teams don’t relate to average fans – like myself. I have found my overall interest in the game slacking off. Much of this is due to the realities of adult life – I now have a family and a job that require my full attention. But I believe that some of my fading interest in the game is related to the fact that professional baseball has gotten away from its roots.
This is why I loved going to see a Cape Cod Baseball League game when Leanne and I vacationed in Cape Cod a few weeks ago. The teams in the league are made up of college baseball players who are looking for a way to work on their skills over the summer. Players come from all over the country to play in this league. They are not paid. They live with volunteer host families. And the games which are played at a high level are free to the public. Players actually walk around during the game to accept entries into the game’s 50-50 drawing which is used to help offset travel expenses for the team.
We went to a game between the Cotuit Kettleers and the Hyannis Harbor Hawks. We literally sat on top of the home team’s dugout. We could hear the players talking. We saw players who were not yet tarnished by the riches of the big leagues. We saw the game of baseball the way it was meant to be played.
Our evening in Hyannis was a reminder that it can be important to get back to the basics. We allow so many things to come along and distract us from why and how we started doing what we’re doing – whether it’s work, school, church, or even family. It’s easy to be distracted by the next big thing. It’s not steroids or free agency, but we are often distracted by other things like non-stop activities, efforts to accumulate the most toys and gadgets, or a drive to climb higher on the corporate ladder. These things by themselves may not be bad, but I think we often lose sight of why we started a family or why we started working. I think it’s important to get back to the basics, so we can rediscover our love for “the game”.
Has the push for more taken away your love of “the game”?
What can you do today to bring back the love?
Top Posts For July 2011
Once again, it’s amazing all the statistics that are out there for tracking blog traffic. I had my biggest month so far! Below is a list of my top 5 blog posts receiving traffic in July. Four of the five were guest posts which I think is pretty cool. If you missed them, you can click on the links below:
2. Faith Stretch by Beck Gambill
3. Savor The Flavor by Alex Humphrey
4. God in the Spaces by Norman Stolpe
5. Detours by Leanne Stolpe
I love the dialogue that happens through the comments. I continue to meet new people from all over the place. I’m looking forward to a new month in August. As I’ve stated to many before, my blog is a place for me to process some of the things that are stretching me. It’s nice to know that some of these thoughts may be helping others as well.
So here’s my question: Do you blog? What was your most followed blog post this month? What was your favorite post this month?
I’d love to hear from you!
(If you’re interested in guest posting on my blog, please drop me a comment. I’d love to connect with you.)
Look What I Found In My Closet – Notes From My Last Willow Creek Group Life Groups Conference
Okay. I have a confession to make. Many of you will find this surprising as I am generally known as an organized person. I’m not always great at dealing with smaller paperwork. As I learned today, many of the receipts and small notes that I carry around in my pockets end up in a pile in my closet. Today, I had an opportunity to get in there and do some clean up, and I discovered a small sheet of notes from my last Willow Creek Group Life Conference. I thought I’d share them with you here, because I think they still apply.
Conference Overview:
– Just like water and oxygen, COMMUNITY is essential to living.
– I don’t remember all the details, but the speakers, worship, breakout workshops, and discussion groups were excellent.
– The conference gave me a chance to:
– Rub shoulders with “Group Life” people from around the world (there were roughly 4,000 people at the conference and 13,000 viewing via satellite.
– Get new ideas and resources. (These conferences are always great for this!)
– Recalibrate, Recharge, and Re-vision
My Big Take Homes:
1. I need to be in Community.
2. Check my centerline (Community helps keep me in check).
3. We as Christian leaders have an opportunity to leverage technology for Community.
4. Caught a deeper vision for how discipleship can happen in Community.
5. We have a hope that we need to take into the Community.
I realize that these notes make seem a bit sketchy, but they bring back some great reminders and memories for me.
What conferences have had an impact on you? What conferences do you recommend and why?