The Stretched Blog Visits Some Wise Guy
Today, I’m honored to be guest blogging over at Some Wise Guy. Some Wise Guy is a blog written by K.C. Procter where he explores the everyday thoughts of being a dad. Here’s an excerpt from my post, titled Don’t Blink. Please head over to K.C.’s blog to read the rest of the post and to see what else is going on at Some Wise Guy. Drop K.C. a comment and tell him that I sent you.
Time flies when you’re a dad. Don’t blink!
I’ve been a dad for over fourteen years now, and I often feel like it’s been just fourteen days since my daughter joined our family. This past week, I watched her graduate from middle school. It literally seems like yesterday when we put her on the bus for her first day of kindergarten. I remember her excitement and her little brother’s sadness as she climbed on the bus with her very own backpack and her big smile.
What’s going on in your life right now that is moving too fast? How about something that’s moving too slow?
(For those of you looking for this week’s Ice Breaker, stay tuned to The Stretched Blog over the weekend. We’ll see what we can do!)
Experiment: Free Advertising On The Stretched Blog
Many aspects of blogging are an experiment. Picking the right theme. Choosing the right layout. Deciding on a catchy title for the whole blog or for just a blog post. In some ways, I feel like a scientist as I daily work on the craft of writing. Yesterday’s experiment proved to be worth while. The experiment involved guest posting over at Jeremy Statton’s blog (Living Better Stories) and hosting guest blogger Kevin Haggerty (TheIsleOfMan.Net). Yesterday, The Stretched Blog experienced its single biggest day of traffic to date. (If you haven’t done so already check out those two posts titled Rediscovering My Dream and Learning To Count To Five.)
With this in mind, I’d like to try another experiment today. Are you ready?
I’d like to offer three free advertising spots that will go on the right hand menu bar of my main page. I will select the “winners” of the spots based on response to this post. All you need to do is tell me why you think The Stretched Blog would be a good place to promote your blog. I’ll choose the three winners, and I’ll reach out to you via e-mail to coordinate the actual advertisement. I can probably help out a little with creating the advertisement, but I’m hoping that you might already have an idea that would fit in this spot. The spots will be 125 x 125. I’ll announce the winners in a few days. Sound good? Let’s try it!
Why do you think The Stretched Blog would be a good place to promote your blog?
How are you experimenting on your blog these days?
The Stretched Blog Visits Living Better Stories
Today is an exciting day here on The Stretched Blog. I have the privilege of guest posting over at Jeremy Statton’s blog (Living Better Stories) today. My post titled Rediscovering My Dreams shares some of my journey and thoughts regarding overseas missions. Here’s an excerpt to get you started:
It was almost two years ago that my wife and I were making final preparations for the missions trip of a lifetime to Nairobi, Kenya.
A Painful Death
As we finalized our packing list and visited the doctors for our final immunizations, the wheels began to fall off our plans. My wife was starting to deal with significant anxiety issues and her health began to deteriorate. We wrestled with a decision we dreaded.
Should we go on this trip and risk health problems in an unfamiliar country? Or should we cancel the trip and miss out on this adventure?
[To read the rest, click here.]
Please head over to read the rest of the post. Also, check out the rest of Jeremy’s blog, and sign-up to become one of his regular readers.
As I mentioned earlier, Kevin Haggerty is guest posting here today. Check out his post titled Learning To Count To Five by clicking here.
Learning To Count To Five – Guest Post by Kevin Haggerty
Today, I have the privilege of presenting a guest post by Kevin Haggerty. Kevin and I have become friends over the past few months thanks to the wonders of the blog world. His writing at The Isle of Man is generally humorous and he often shares thoughts in his daily posts that stretch me. I’m honored that Kevin would consider sharing his Stretching story here on the blog with The Stretched Community. I’ve included a short bio for Kevin at the end of the post. Please visit his blog, add his blog to your regular reading, leave him a comment, and tell him that I sent you. Thanks!
[If you’re interested in sharing your Stretched story with the rest of The Stretched Community, leave me a comment so we can connect.]
Learning to Count to Five
About a week ago, Jon asked me to write a guest post for his “Stretched” series. It was kind of comical to me, the timing of it anyway, because I’m currently going through a period of my life where I’ve never felt more stretched.
Here’s the brief rundown, for those of you who don’t know me:
- In October of last year, my wife, Kim, and I bought our first house, after being married for two years.
- In December, we received the incredible news that Kim was pregnant with our very first child.
- In March, I found out that I was not going to be offered a contract to teach next year at the school for which I’ve worked for the past six years. Essentially, I was going to be (and have been) laid off.
That’s the short version.
It certainly isn’t how I drew it up, but when does life ever work that way? We don’t get the 12-month forecast for our life. Though, that would be nice, and if that were a website, I’d totally add it to my RSS reader subscriptions.
Instead, we generally get hit with life-changing news, then we have to adjust on the fly, like a hockey line change.
You don’t get advanced notice. You just have to make it up as you go.
So, at 32 years old, I’m at a place where I’m having to really figure things out. It sounds torturous, and in a lot of ways, it is.
But it’s also an awesome opportunity.
I have the chance to start over, in a lot of ways. I have the chance to take all the things I’ve learned and experienced and use them to branch out in a new and exciting direction.
Currently, on my blog, I’ve started a series of posts called “When Life Karate Kicks You in the Face.”
It will feature multiple volumes and will go until I’m done. Yesterday was the beginning of the series and featured Volume 1. I’d love it if you checked it out. Tomorrow, I’ll be posting Volume 2. It’d be great if you were able to read that too, and maybe even share in the discussion as it unfolds.
In the meantime, I want to share with you some of the things that have encouraged me during this down period.
There are two things I’ve used to help me when I am tempted to give into the demons. Maybe they’ll help you too.
Advice from Jack Shepard
In the hit television series, LOST, one of the main characters, Jack Shephard, gave some advice on how to overcome adversity.
In the very first episode, Jack tells Kate (also one of the main characters) a story to help her deal with the fear she is facing, while she is in the middle of stitching up a wound on his back.
Jack can tell the story better than I can, so why don’t I let him tell you instead:
It seems corny and cliché, but there’s a lot of truth to it. Jack was faced with a circumstance wherein he could have run for the door, and allowed disaster to overtake him (and the poor girl on the operating table), or he could have got a hold of himself and fixed it.
In life, often, those are our only two choices. Fight or Flight. Sometimes, I run away. But I can’t run away from this one. My wife needs me. My unborn son needs me. I could run, but I’m not going to.
Encouragement from a Friend
During all of this, my friend Shawn Smucker has been an incredible resource and encouragement to me.
If you’re unaware, Shawn wrote a book, Building a Life out of Words, about his decision to walk away from his business as a contractor, to follow his dream of being a writer, all as a married father of two young children.
Shawn made it work for him, but it wasn’t easy. Not in the slightest.
Shawn has been aware of my journey. I’ve talked to him a lot, along the way. He’s given me advice and really helped me a lot as I’ve been trying to decide just what to do.
One day, he e-mailed me. He asked me how I was doing. It was one of my “bad days.” I was honest with him. I told him I was depressed. I told him I wasn’t doing well, and that I was considering abandoning my dream of being a writer to do something “safe.”
Here was his response:
Hang in there, man. It’s a long road. There’s no time for feeling sorry for yourself.
I saved that. It meant a lot to me. I’m so grateful he had the courage to reach through the internet, grab me and shake me when I needed it.
There’s no time for feeling sorry for yourself. Sound urgent, doesn’t it?
It was urgent. It still is.
What will it be for you today? Will you give into the fear? Or will you count to five, face the terror and then take the control back. It really is a choice.
What will you choose today?
Kevin Haggerty is a 32-year old husband and expecting father. He runs and writes for a humor blog called TheIsleOfMan.Net. For his full-time job, Kevin is a middle school teacher and basketball coach. He also writes for a mixed martial arts (MMA) blog called MMAMania.com. He’s the oldest of seven children, a continual skeptic and smart people think he’s funny (at least that’s what he tells himself).
Announcing June Giveaway Winners
Last week, I announced that I would be giving away two prizes to lucky winners. The winners were selected randomly, but their chances increased based on interaction on the blog and other social media platforms. This was the first time, I’ve tried something quite like this, and I’m happy to say that the results were promising. I added several new subscribers to the blog and new fans of the Jon Stolpe Stretched Facebook Fan Page. There were also new commenters on the blog this week, and The Stretched Blog received several plugs this week via Twitter. Overall, the blog experienced the third highest week of traffic since the beginning of the year. I will definitely be trying this type of giveaway again.
Okay, I’ve delayed long enough. Here are the winners of this month’s giveaway:
Winner of Platform by Michael Hyatt: Mark Sullens
(Mark entered by being a fan of the Jon Stolpe Stretched Facebook Fan Page.)
Winner of Love Does by Bob Goff: Tim McNatt
(Tim entered by being a subscriber of The Stretched Blog.)
I’ll be reaching out to the winners this week via e-mail to confirm mailing addresses. Thanks to everyone for entering this month’s giveaway!
What would you like to see me giveaway next month? What other giveaways should The Stretched Community check out?
Random Stretch Thoughts
Life continues to provide plenty of stretching opportunities. Today’s post is simply some of the things that are stretching me these days.
1. Headaches. Since the month of February, I’ve been dealing with lots of headaches. I haven’t had a migraine for a few weeks, but I’m still wrestling a bit with the day-to-day nuisance headaches. I started seeing someone who is helping with deep tissue message. This seems to be helping, but it seems like I still have a way to go until my back, shoulders, and neck loosen up.
2. Running. Yesterday, I shared about the 2nd Annual Race to Remember. Between blogging, headaches, and the other busyness of life, it can be a challenge to find a regular routine for running. I’m hoping that a date on the calendar will inspire me to be more consistent in my running.
3. Gardening. I don’t talk about gardening a whole lot here, but it is still one of my passions. Admittedly, this hobby has taken a backseat to my family, my job, my writing, and other activities. I did manage to get my garden planted a few weeks ago. Now, I need to figure out how to keep the deer and groundhogs out of the garden. And I need to find time to weed.
4. Blogging. I love the blog, and I intend on keeping it going. My main struggle is landing on my next path forward – What is the next step for the Stretched Blog? Should I write and eBook? If so, where should I focus? I know for certain that I want to use my writing and blogging for something way bigger than myself. The Guatemala trip and the Stretched house is confirmation that anything is possible.
5. Guatemala. I really need to work on my Spanish. In nearly a month and a half, I’ll be making this life changing trip. I pray that I will be alert to the impact of this trip. We’re less than $2,700 away from paying for the house! Feel free to hop on board.
6. Family and marriage. This is a huge priority for me. Many times I feel like my attention and energy isn’t always where it should be. I don’t want to look back with any regrets. In a week, my daughter will be graduating from middle school. I know she’s ready for high school, but this milestone is a reminder that time isn’t slowing down. I need to make the most of the opportunities.
7. Faith. To put it plainly, my relationship with God has to be the most important thing in my life. I’m constantly filling my mind with good things, but I’m realizing more and more that I need to be still. This stretches me to the core.
I’m sure there are many other things that are stretching me, but this list provides a glimpse into the ones that keep coming back to me. I’m thankful that God is patient with us while we stretch. I’m thankful that he desires a relationship that is new, exciting, and stretching.
What’s stretching you see days?
(Don’t forget to get in on the giveaway that’s going on this week on the Stretched blog. Click here for more details. There’s still time to win Platform by Michael Hyatt or Love Does by Bob Goff.)
May 2012 Top Posts and Commenters
May was another record-breaking month for the Stretched blog. Overall traffic increased 11.26% from last month’s previous record high. In addition, the Jon Stolpe Stretched Facebook fan page has added several new followers over the past month. The community and platform are growing, and I’m excited to see how God may use the Stretched Community to impact the world.
As always, I like to share the top posts for the past month. Most of this month’s most popular posts were posted in May; however, one post from March continues to be at the top of the charts for this month. Here are the top posts from May 2012:
1. The Power To Change A Family Tree (5/2/2012)
2. Leap Of Faith (3/21/2012)
3. Book Review: By Faith, Not By Sight by Scott MacIntyre (5/29/2012)
4. Writing – A Strange Discipline (5/24/2012)
5. My Mom (5/8/2012)
6. Ice Breaker – Star Wars (5/3/2012)
7. Perkiomen Valley Blogger’s Society (5/20/2012)
8. Ice Breaker – Questions For A Stretched Blogger (5/17/2012)
9. 10 Things To Avoid On Camping Trips (5/27/2012)
10. Foundations Class Starts Today (5/6/2012)
And here are the top commenters for May 2012:
1. Larry Carter (28)
2. Tom Tarver (19)
3. Joe Lalonde (15)
4. Michael Shaw (14)
Thanks again to everyone who stopped by and to everyone who left a comment. Your readership, comments, and friendship mean the world to me. In the coming month, I will be looking for more ways to extend the Stretched Community and to broaden my platform. I am looking to launch a contest for this month. I am also looking for new opportunities to guest post around the blog world. Finally, I will be starting to build a guest post backlog and interview backlog to post while I’m in Guatemala later this summer. If you’re interested in guest posting here or participating in a Stretched interview, drop me a note in the comments so we can connect.
Thanks again for a great month. Don’t forget to share The Stretched Blog with your family and friends.
If you’re a blogger, what was the top post on your blog this month? If you’re not a blogger, what was your favorite post here this month?
Ice Breaker – Relax
Today, I head out for my annual camping pilgrimage to the Poconos. I have been making this trip for the past twenty-one years (with only one miss) with the same group of guys who are originally from my home town in New Jersey. For me this is the perfect opportunity to relax. On this trip, I’ll go fishing, catch up with some great long-time friends, and I’ll slow down compared to my normally busy pace of life.
For today’s Stretched Ice Breaker question, we’ll continue this theme.
Question: What is your favorite way to relax?
(For those of you who are new here, an Ice Breaker is a question designed to help us get to know each other. Each week, I ask a question which I’ll answer in the post. Then I turn it to the readers to answer the question in the comments.)
I can’t wait to read your answer to this week’s question!
Writing – A Strange Discipline
As I write these words, it’s 4:55AM.
People often ask me about my writing. “When do you write?” “How do you come up with the ideas for a different post everyday?” “Why in the world do you write?”
Writing is a strange discipline.
Believe me when I say that I have plenty of other things to do. My family, my job, my own time for quiet reflection and personal fitness – these are all things that keep me very busy. Yet somehow I find time to write. I think it has to do with priorities. Is writing enough of a priority for me that I would get up extra early to “participate” in this activity? Or is writing enough of a priority for me that I would put other things aside or modify my schedule to make sure I had daily time to write? If you’ve been following along since late June or early July 2011, you know that the answer is yes. Since then, I have posted nearly every weekday and many weekend days. Writing is a strange discipline.
When people ask me about my content, I’d be lying if I didn’t tell them that writer’s block occasionally sneaks in. But honestly, life provides so much to write about. It’s often a matter of simply opening up my eyes, my ears, and my mind to the world that is happening around me. We live in such a dynamic world, writing is an opportunity to slow down even briefly and to take a snap shot in time of what’s going on in my head. The other answer I tell people is that it’s important to be plugged in. Yes, I read a lot of blogs, and I listen to a lot of podcasts. But I would say that reading books and reading God’s Word are two essential tools for a Christian blogger. It’s important to keep my mind engaged and well fed. This is key to writing everyday. Writing is a strange discipline.
I write for many reasons. First and foremost, I hope my writing will bring glory to God. Everything after that is gravy. I write to wrestle out loud with the thoughts and ideas that come and go in my head. I write to encourage others (at least I hope this is true). I write to tap into my creative side (yes, even engineers can have small amounts of creativity). I write to keep of record of my “stretch marks”. If I’m honest, I write in hopes of extending my personal platform – of gaining some notoriety – of making my own personal dent in this world. I write, because I’ve discovered that I am a writer. Yes, writing is a strange discipline.
Why do you write? When do you write? What do you write about?
Answers To Your Stretching Questions
On Friday, I asked you to ask me any questions. Today, I’ll do my best to answer the questions. This is one of my longer posts, but I hope you’ll find in interesting and perhaps a little humorous. I’d love to hear your thoughts on my responses to your questions. Thanks so much to each of you for some wonderful and challenging questions (I may just have to do this again some time).
What would you go back and tell 16 year old you if you could time travel? from Larry Carter at Deuceology
Great question, Larry. I’d tell myself to buy stock in Apple. I’d tell 16 year-old Jon Stolpe to be confident in who God made him. I’d tell me that I am a writer. I’d tell me not to sweat the girlfriend thing, because God has an unbelievable wife in store for me for the future. I’d remind me that I am a leader.
Who is your favorite blogger? from Rob Shepherd at robshep.com
This is really a tough one as I follow so many great bloggers. Perhaps, my favorite is my dad, Norman Stolpe. My dad is a writer’s writer. He has been writing for years. He doesn’t blog regularly though he keeps a blog. But his weekly sermons have to be considered as some type of blogging. My dad has inspired me on many different levels when it comes to my writing. I don’t ever expect to hold a candle to his writing skill, but I hope that my dad will be proud that I’ve followed in his writing footsteps in some small way.
What motivated you to start blogging? from Rob Shepherd at robshep.com
I have a friend, Frank Chiapperino, who was my biggest encouragement to start blogging. Frank was our adult ministries pastor at the time, and he now pastors his own church in Minnesota. Frank still blogs fairly regularly about leadership, technology, and small groups.
What verse in the Bible challenges you the most? from Rob Shepherd at robshep.com
Colossians 4:2-6 is one of my favorite verses and probably one of the verses that challenges me the most. Making the most of every opportunity means so much to me. I need to make the most in sharing my faith with others. I need to make the most of the time I have with my friends, family, and co-workers. I don’t want my time here on earth to be a waste. I want to hear God say, “Well done, my good and faithful servant.”
Would you rather have spam for hands or mayo for a tongue? from Rob Shepherd at robshep.com
This ones easy for me. I hate (I strongly dislike) mayo, so I’ve got to go with Spam for hands. If I had a mayo tongue, I’d be throwing up all the time.
It’s a question I asked on my blog yesterday. If you wrote a cardboard testimony what would it say? from Eileen Knowles at The Scenic Route
“God love me – broken and bruised, impatient and imperfect, STRETCHED!”
Where do you see yourself in 15 years? from Joe Lalonde at jmlalonde.com
In 15 years, I will be 55. I’ll have two kids in their later twenties, and I will have been married for over 30 years. I hope to be 100% debt free including the house. I hope to be giving way more than I’m getting. I’d love to have written at least one book by that time – though I’m still figuring all that out. If I stay at my current job (which is definitely a possibility), I will have been there for over 31 years. I’d like to continue to grow in respect. I’d like to be known for investing in others like no other leader before me. I’m not sure if blogging will still exist in 15 years, but I’d like to use my writing as a tool to expand the Kingdom.
As a man of strong religious beliefs, what do you think is in general the greatest challenge today to people who seek to maintain their religious faith? And what is the greatest challenge to maintaining your faith personally? For example, is it that science has called into question many fundamental beliefs in the Bible? Is it rampant materialism in our society? Is it pressure from the mass media to adopt more secular values? When people who are hypocritical in their religious practice are exposed to the public, is that the greatest challenge to believers? Or is personal hardship and suffering a greater challenge to faith than all of these? from Michael Shaw at I Love Skippack
Wow, this is a pretty deep question which I may need to explore in more depth in a future post. My short answer is this: The greatest challenge today to people who seek to maintain their religious faith is the same challenge that has plagued people since the beginning of time. We are so bent on being in control. We’re self-centered, sinful creatures. We all struggle with ME, ME, ME. And we live in a culture where this pull towards ME is so strong. It’s so easy to be distracted by the things of this world that call to us saying “I can help you get ahead by doing this or doing that.” For me personally, it’s not much different. I get distracted by thoughts of trying to get ahead, trying to make a name for myself, and trying to keep up with the Joneses. The Bible talks about “seeking first the Kingdom of God” in Matthew 6. This can be a real challenge and can be nearly impossible without the support of family and friends of faith who spur me on. This is part of the reason I love this blogging community. While I hope my writing will spur other on, it’s often the Stretched Community that pushes me to keep the faith. For that, I’m grateful beyond words.
How much are you ready to stretch yourself in order to see your God-given dreams come to pass? from Joe Abraham at joeandancy.com
Appropriately, this question is rather stretching for me. I’m fairly certain that I’ve shared this here before – I hate change. I like things to be the same. I would eat the same thing for breakfast and lunch every day given the choice. So it’s no surprise that “stretching” to achieve my God-given dreams is not always easy for me. Honestly, there have been a few setbacks along life’s journey that have dampened some of my dreaming, but I’m relearning some of the skill related to dreaming big again. I shared some of this in a guest post over at Expect the Exceptional a few weeks ago, and I’ve been sharing some of these thoughts especially related to my leap of faith decision to go to Guatemala. I think I struggle most in this area in trusting God financially to provide should I decide to leave my career and pursue something else. I’m not convinced that this is where God’s calling me, but I think it would be the biggest challenge for now. I’m not sure this fully addresses your question, but I hope it’s a start. Thanks!
Wow! This was more challenging than I expected. Thank you to everyone who answered the call to question me. What’s your answer to one of these questions? Or better yet, what’s the one question you’re most afraid to answer?